"Cindy Crawford Isle" joke
A guy was stranded on a desert island with Cindy Crawford. He played it cool, and he didn't make any moves towards her for several weeks. Finally, one day he asked her if maybe they could start up a physical relationship, so as to attend to each other's needs. Cindy said she was game and a very vigorous sexual relationship began.
Everything was great for about 4 months. One day, the guy went to Cindy and said,' I'm having this problem. It's kind of a guy thing, but I need to ask you a favor.' Cindy said,' Okay.' The guy said,' Can I borrow your eyebrow pencil?' Cindy looked at him a little funny, but said,' Sure, you can borrow my eyebrow pencil.' The guy then said,' Do you mind if I use the eyebrow pencil to draw a moustache on you?' Cindy is getting a little worried, but says,' Okay.' Then the guy said,' Can you wear some of my guy clothing, I need for you to look more like a man.' Cindy is getting a little disappointed at this point, but says,' Well I guess so.' Then the guy says to Cindy,' Do you mind if I call you Fred?' Cindy, very dejected, says,' I guess not.'
So, the guy reaches out and grabs Cindy by the arms and says,' Fred, you won't believe who I've been sleeping with these past four months!'
A young woman goes into the doctor's office for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a red "H" on her chest. "How did you get that mark on your chest?" asks the doctor. "Oh, my boyfriend went to Harvard and he's so proud of it that he never more...
A very attractive lady goes up to a bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does, she begins to gently caress his full more...
Q: What is the similarity between a rubix cube and a dick?
A: The more you play with them, the harder they get!
A guy says to his friend, "I can't remember if the doctor told me my wife has AIDS or Alzheimer's."
His friend says, "It's simple. Drive her to the other side of town. If she finds her way home, don't fuck her."