"Der-ty night before Christmas" joke

Der next night vas Christmas
Der night is vas schtill
Der stockings vas hung
By der chimney to fill.

Der shildren vas snuggled
All up in der bed
And mama in nightgown
And I up ahead...

Vas searchink around
In der dark for der toys
Ve krept around kviet
Not to make any noise.

Und mudder vas carrying
Der toys in her gown
Showink her person
From up her vaist down.

Und ven she came near
Der crib of our boy
Our youngest und sveetest
Our pride und our choy...

His eyes vide open
As he peeked from his cot...
Und seen everythink
Dot his mudder has got!

He didn't even notice
Der toys in her lap...
He chust asked,
"For whom ist dot little fur cap?"

Und mudder said "hush"
Und she laughed mit delight...
I tink I give dat
To your father tonight!