"God granting miracles" joke
Golfing with the Bishop
The Bishop had been planning a relaxing afternoons golf with the Abbot, but was let down at the last minute. Fortunately, he had made the aquaintance of a Sister Mary (who else?) from the local chapel.
Sister Mary was quite flattered to be invited by the Bishop to play Golf, and accepted the offer gladly. When the Bishope missed a putt on the 16th hole, however, she was shocked to hear him say, "Fuckin' shit, I missed!"
"I'm deeply ashamed of you," said a white-faced Sister Mary.
The Bishop shot her a dirty look and went on to play the 17th hole. Not long afterwards he exclaimed "Fuckin' shit, I missed!"
"I'm warning you, Bishop," said the Nun piously, "God will strike you down if you don't stop using that kind of language."
The Bishop also missed the crucial putt on the 18th hole, and uttered the same curse at full volume. Suddenly there was a deafening clap of thunder, and a blinding flash of lightning, and the nun dissappeared.
A few seconds later a voice boomed from the heavens, "FUCKIN' SHIT, I MISSED!"
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