"Handy bear" joke
A bear walks into a bar and takes a seat at the bar.
"Can i get you anything mate?", says the barman.
"yeah, ill have a pint of fosters and a... packet of peanuts please!"
With that the bloke looks at the bear as he hands him the pint and says "ay maye, whats with the huge pause?"
Two cats: Felix & Un-deux-trois, decided to have a race to see who could swim across the river first.Guess who won? Felix! Because Un-deux-trois cat sank.
(Un deux trois quatre cinq)
A guy says to his friend, "I can't remember if the doctor told me my wife has AIDS or Alzheimer's."
His friend says, "It's simple. Drive her to the other side of town. If she finds her way home, don't fuck her."
A couple of hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: “My friend is dead! What can more...
One day a man from Alabama comes to Georgia to get an education. He goes to the first professor he sees and says, “What can you teach me?”
Shocked, the professor answers, “Well, I can teach you about the power of reasoning.”
With a questioned look on more...
funniest F****** joke ever
byya i got a joke for ya what do you call a deer with one eye?
a F***** one eyed deer