"Heavy Thinker-like Drinker" joke
One day Rastus and Liza Jane were sitting at the bus stop when Rastus ups and asks, "Liza Jane can I's look up your dress before the bus gets here?"Liza Jane was startled and said, "No Rastus you cain't!"Well Rastus persisted and persisted till finally Liza Jane said, "Alright if'n it will shut you up you can." So Rastus looks up her dress and sees that see has no panties on to which he exclaims, "Sho is a wonder!"Well the bus shows up and they gets on.Next day, Rastus and Liza Jane are sitting there again when Rastus ups and asks her, "Liza Jane, can I look up your dress again?" Well Liza Jane at first refused, but as the day before she then gave in. So Rastus looks up there and seeing no panties he exclaims, again, "Sho is a wonder!"Well this goes on for a few days when on the last day that Liza Jane would permit Rastus to look up her dress she tells him, "Rastus you can look up my dress but you have to tell me one thing?"Rastus replies, "What's that?""Every time you look up my dress you says, "Sho is a wonder. Sho is a wonder what?"To which Rastus replies, "Sho is a wonder your guts don't fall out!!"
Quasimodo, the bell-ringer for the Notre Dame cathedral in Paris, goes to the cardinal. "Cardinal, I'm getting pretty old and I'd like to retire, and live the rest of my life peacefully." The cardinal says, "That's fine Quasi, we'll just let the town crier know so more...
I'm hungry:
"I could eat the crotch out of a dead leper's undies."
"I could eat the horse and chase the jockey."
"So hungry I'd eat a shit sandwich, only I don't like bread."
"I could eat the arse out of a rag doll more...
Three ministers - a Presbyterian, a Methodist, and a Baptist - and their wives were on a cruise. A tidal wave came up and swamped the ship; they all drowned, and before long, they were standing before St. Peter.
First came the Presbyterian and his wife. St. Peter more...
A mother had 3 virgin daughters. They were all getting married within a short time period. Because Mom was a bit worried about how their sex life would get started, she made them all promise to send a postcard from the honeymoon with a few words on how marital sex felt.
The more...
A trucker picks up a hitchhiker who climbs up in the cab and notices a monkey on the dashboard.
After a few miles, he asks the driver what the monkey is for.
The driver says "I'll show you," and with that he hits the monkey with the back of his hand, sending more...