"My Reason For Firing My Secretary" joke
Last week was my fortieth birthday and I wasn't feeling so great that morning to begin with. I went downstairs to breakfast, knowing that my wife would be pleasant, wish me a happy birthday and have a gift for me. But, she didn't even say "Good Morning", let alone "Happy Birthday".
I thought to myself, "That's a wife for you. Surely the children will remember." They came into breakfast and didn't say a word, so when I left for the office I was feeling pretty low and depressed.
As I walked into my office, June, my secretary, said, "Good Morning, Happy Birthday, Boss", and I began to feel a little better that someone had remembered. At noon, June knocked on my door and said, "It's such a beautiful day and it is your birthday, let's go to lunch, just you and I." I said, "That's the best thing I've heard all day. Let's go."
Out to lunch we went, but not to where I normally go. Instead, we went out into the country to a private little place. We each had a couple of martinis and enjoyed a wonderful lunch. On the way back to the office, June said, "It's such a beautiful day and we really don't have to go back to the office, do we? Let's go to my apartment and I'll fix you another martini." It sounded good to me, so I agreed.
We went to her apartment and enjoyed another martini. Then she said, "If you don't mind, boss, I think I'll go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable." I didn't mind at all so I told her to go ahead.
She went into the bedroom and a few minutes later came back out carrying a birthday cake, followed by my wife and children. They were all happily singing Happy Birthday. And there I sat with nothing on but my socks.
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