"Parrrot boy & daddy" joke
There was this punk who got on a bus. He sat next to an old man who
started staring at him, because he was dressed in really colorful
clothing.
He had all this colorful make-up on, and his hair was spiked up with
red, green,& yellow with feathers.
The punk was getting sick of being stared at so he said to the old man, "Hey, old man, what are you lookin'at, eh? Didn't you do
anything strange when you were a teenager?"
"Well, yeah," the old man answered. "Once I got so drunk that I screwed a parrot, so I can't help but think that maybe you're my son.
Goldie, a middle aged Jewish woman goes to see a fortune-teller.
"Two men are madly in love with me!" Goldie says. "Who will be the lucky one?"
The swami answers...."Morris will marry you, and Irving will be the lucky one."
Why do men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
For the same reason dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
After having their 11th child, an Alabama couple decided that was
Enough (they could not afford a larger doublewide). So, the husband went to his doctor (who also treated mules) and told him that he and his wife/cousin didn't want to have any more children.
The doctor more...
Little Johnny's mother took him to a supermarket to buy some food.
"Anything you break comes out of your allowance money!" shouted Johnny's mother.
Johnny turned around and said "But you don't give me any allowance money!"
"Yes, and now you more...