"Redneck Joke" joke

Two rednecks decided they weren't going anywhere in life, and thought they should go to college to get ahead.
The first redneck went in to see the counselor, who told him to take Math, History, and Logic.
"What's Logic?" the first redneck asked. The professor answered by saying, "Let me give you an example. Do you own a weed eater?" "I sure do." said the first redneck.
"Then I can assume, using logic, that you have a yard," replied the professor.
"That's real good!" said the redneck.
The professor continued, "Logic will also tell me that since you have a yard, you also own a house."
Impressed, the redneck said, "Amazin!"
"And since you own a house, logic dictates that you have a wife," continued the professor.
"That's Betty Mae! This is incredible!" The redneck is obviously catching on.
"Finally, since you have a wife, logically I can assume that you are heterosexual," said the professor.
"You're absolutely right!" exclaimed the redneck. Why that's the most fascinatin' thing I ever heard! I cain't wait to take that logic class!!"
The redneck, proud of the new world opening up to him, walked back into the hallway, where his friend was still waiting.
"So what classes are ya takin'?" asked the friend.
"Math, History, and Logic!" replied the first redneck.
"What in tarnation is logic???" asked his friend.
"Let me give you an example. Do ya own a weed eater?" asked the first redneck.
"No," his friend replied.
"You're QUEER, ain't ya?"

A very attractive lady goes up to a bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does, she begins to gently caress his full more...

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A police officer came upon a terrible wreck where the driver and passenger had been killed. As he looked upon the wreckage a little monkey came out of the brush and hopped around the crashed car. The officer looked down at the monkey and said, "I wish you could more...

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I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately
needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my
gas with the beat of the music.

After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee,
and more...

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A guy says to his friend, "I can't remember if the doctor told me my wife has AIDS or Alzheimer's."
His friend says, "It's simple. Drive her to the other side of town. If she finds her way home, don't fuck her."

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A couple of women were playing golf one sunny Saturday morning. The first of the twosome teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole.
Indeed, the ball hit one of the men, and he immediately clasped his hands more...

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