"Rush Limbaugh's Limo" joke
Rush Limbaugh and his driver are cruising down a country road one day in the limo. Suddenly, out of no where, a pig rushes in front of the car. The driver can't stop in time or swerve and he hits the pig, killing it instantly.
They see a farm house just ahead on the side of the road and assume that the pig belongs to the farmer who lives there. Rush says,' Pull up there and go in and tell them that you have run over their pig. Be careful that you don't get them upset. You know how they feel about their animals.'
The driver does as he is told, stopping in front of the farm house and going up to the door. He knocks on the door and is admitted inside.
Three hours later, the driver finally comes out with a smile and a wave to the farmer and his family. Rush says to the driver as he gets in,' What the hell happened to you? You've been gone for six hours!'
'Well,' the driver says,' I went in and told them. The farmer ushered me to a chair and brought me a tall glass of corn liquor. His wife insisted on fixing me a huge feast to eat. The farmers boy shined my shoes and got me a pipe of really good tobacco to smoke. Then the farmer's daughter came in dressed in a short skirt, sat on my lap and offered to take me in her bedroom. We had great sex.
'When I came back out, they were all even friendlier than before. I tried to leave twice before I was finally able to get out of there.'
Rush looks at him incredulously and asks,' What exactly did you tell them when you first went in?'.
The driver says,' I told them that I was Rush Limbaugh's driver and that I just ran over the pig.'.
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