"The History of Santa Claus - Part 1" joke

The History of Santa Claus - Part 1
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== The Untold Story ==
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1689
Spanish-German explorer Santa Claus discovers the North Pole, and
establishes a small base camp.
1691
Because of harsh and meager living conditions, Claus' crew
abandons him.
1692
Claus is rescued by the Viking ship Hvorfor. He returns to Europe,
bringing some items along with him from the North Pole. He finds
he is able to sell them quite easily, making a small profit.
1703
Claus saves up enough money to buy a small ship and crew, and
returns to the North Pole. Upon arriving, he finds his base camp,
half-buried but still intact.
1704
Claus returns to Europe with a shipload of North Pole artifacts,
and is successful in selling them. He makes enough profit to
increase his crew, and buys building materials to expand his polar
base.
1705
Claus returns again to the North Pole, and builds quarters for him
and his crew, and sets up the Polar Exports Company.
1716
After six shiploads of exports, the European market is flooded with
polar artifacts, as well as the phony ones making charlatans rich.
Seeing this decline, Claus decides to invest his money by starting
a toy company in his native Germany.
1720
Claus Toys becomes the largest toy company in Germany, but only
because of Claus' underhanded business dealings. (It was also
rumored that Claus was dealing with enemy countries as well).
Competitors urged government officials to begin an investigation.
1721
Enough evidence is found, and charges are drawn up against the
Claus Toys Company. Claus himself refuses to release his records.
1722
The German Supreme Court finds Claus guilty of tax evasion and of
treason. When news of this breaks, Claus' employees all turn
against him and his company.
1723
Claus is exiled to Sicily, and shortly before leaving, he absconds
with all of the company's funds.
1724
A search party is sent to the Mediterranean to recover the funds,
however, Claus hears of this ahead of time, and he and his Sicilian
wife flee for their lives. (Some say he went into Northern Africa,
but it is generally assumed that this was only a ruse to lure the
searchers off course. He is believed to have returned to his
North Pole base).
1725
Claus II is born en route to the North Pole.
1725-1734
The Claus' lay low at the North Pole. Claus teaches his son the
arts of toymaking and business dealings.
1735
Rumor has it that Claus has hired Scandinavian builders to
construct a castle for him at the North Pole, making use of almost
half of the company funds.
1739
The castle is finished, and is one of the largest in the world.
Claus II reaches his 15th birthday, and in the same year, Claus'
wife dies, accidentally falling from a balcony in one of the
castle's great halls.
1740
Claus, mourning his wife, becomes increasingly ill.
1745
Santa Claus II becomes of age, and begins taking care of the castle
and of his sick father.
1747
Using the remaining company funds, Claus II builds a small city
around the castle to attract workers and craftsmen.
1748
Word of the North Pole settlement reaches Europe. The Elves of
Eastern Europe, quickly becoming political outcasts and striving
for a better life, begin immigrating in waves to the North Pole.
1753
All the elves have left Eastern Europe and have become firmly
established at the North Pole. Claus II begins his father's toy
company once again, with an estimated 30, 000 elves employed.
Claus I dies, at age 89.
1755
The North Pole officially becomes a nation, and Claus II and his
wife take the throne. The toy business continues to flourish, and
the elves enjoy prosperity. Claus III is born.