"Things Not to Hear During Surgery" joke
Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy. Someone call the janitor - we're going to need a mop. Bo! Bo! Come back with that! Bad Dog! Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that? Hand me that....uh....that uh....thingie. Oh no! I just lost my Rolex. Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before? Darn, there go the lights again. Ya know, there's big money in kidneys. Heck, the guy's got two of' em. Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens! What's this doing here? I hate it when they're missing stuff in here. That's cool! Now can you make his leg twitch?! I wish I hadn't forgotten my glasses. Well folks, this will be an experiment for us all. Sterile, shcmerile. The floor's clean, right? Anyone see where I left that scalpel? This patient has already had some kids, am I correct? Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough. Darn! Page 47 of the manual is missing!
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