"Top Ten Signs You've Bought A Bad Computer" joke

10. The lower corner of the screen has the words 'Etch-A-Sketch' on it.
9. It's celebrity spokesman is that 'Hey Vern!' guy.
8. You need some jumper cables and a friend's car to start it.
7. It's slogan is 'Pentium: Redefining Mathematics'.
6. The 'quick reference' manual is 120 pages long.
5. Every time you turn it on, all the dogs in the neighborhood begin howling.
4. The screen often displays the message, 'Ain't it break time yet?'
3. The manual contains only one sentence, 'Good Luck!'
2. The only chip inside is a Dorito.
1. You've decided that your computer is an excellent addition to your fabulous paperweight collection.

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