"Q. What is the mating call of the ugly blonde?" joke

Q. What is the mating call of the ugly blonde?
A. (Screaming) "I said. I'm drunk!"
Q. Why do blondes wear green lipstick?
A. Because red means stop.
Q. Why do blondes wear hoop earrings?
A. They have to have some place to rest their ankles.
Q. Why do blondes where big hoop earrings?
A. To put their feet through.
Q. What's a brunette's mating call?
A. Has that blonde gone yet?
A2. When is that blonde bitch going to leave!?
A3. "All the blondes have gone home!"
Q. What do you say to a blonde that won't give in?
A. "Have another beer."
Q. Why is a blonde like a door knob?
A. Because everybody gets a turn.
Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a Porsche?
A. You don't lend the Porsche out to your friend.
Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a toothbrush?
A. You don't let your best friend borrow your toothbrush.
Q. What is the difference between a blonde and "The Titanic"?
A. They know how many men went down on "The Titanic".
Q. What's the first thing a blonde does in the morning?
A1. Introduces him/her self.
A2. Walks home.
Q. How can you tell when a blonde is dating?
A. By the buckle print on her forehead.
Q. How can you tell who a blonde’s boyfriend is?
A. He's the one with the belt buckle that matches the impression in her forehead.
Q. What two things in the air can get a blonde pregnant?
A. Her feet!
Q. What do blondes and cow-patties have in common?
A. They both get easier to pick-up with age.
Q. What does a screen door and a blonde have in common?
A. The more you bang it, the looser it gets.
Q. What do you call two nuns and a blonde?
A. Two tight ends and a wide receiver.
Q. Why did the blonde cross the road?
A1. Forget the road, what was she doing out of the bedroom!?
Q. Why did the blonde smile when she walked the marriage aisle?
A. She realized she gave her last blowjob.
Q. Why did the blonde have a sore navel?
A. Because her boyfriend was also blond!
Q. Why did they call the blonde "twinkie"?
A. She liked to be filled with cream.
Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a rooster?
A. In the morning a rooster says, "Cock'll-doodl-doooo", while a blonde says, "Any-cock'll-doooo."
Q. What is the difference between a blonde and the Grand Old Duke of York?
A. The Grand Old Duke of York only' had' 10000 men.
Q. Why did the blonde wear condoms on her ears?
A. So she wouldn't get Hearing Aides.
Q. What's the difference between a prostitute, a nymphomaniac, and a blonde?
A. The prostitute says, "Aren't you done yet?"
The nympho says, "Are you done already?"
The blonde says, "Beige... I think I'll paint the ceiling beige."
Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a telephone?
A. It costs 30 cents to use a telephone.
Q. What do blondes wear behind their ears to attract men.
A. Their heels.
Q. What does a blonde do if she is not in bed by 10?
A. She picks up her purse and goes home.
Q. How do you describe the perfect blonde?
A. 3 feet tall, no teeth, and a flat head to rest your beer on.
Q. Why do blondes have vaginas?
A. So guys will talk to them at parties.
Q. What do blondes do after they comb their hair?
A. They pull up their pants.
Q. Why is 68 the maximum speed for blonds?
A. Because at 69 they blow a rod...
Q. What is the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball?
A. You can only put 3 fingers in a bowling ball.
Q. Why do blondes have TGIF on their shoes?
A1. Toes Go In First.
A2. Tits Go In Front.
Q. Why do blondes drive BMWs?
A1. Because they can spell it.
A2. Because they can spell BWM.
Q. Why do blondes like the GST? (GST -- Goods and Services Tax now in effect in Canada)
A1. Because they can spell it.
A2. Because they can spell GTS.
Q. What is 74 to a blonde?
A. 69 plus G. S. T.
Q. What happened to the blonde that was tap dancing?
A. She fell in the sink.
Q. Why do blondes wear shoulder pads?
A. (With a rocking of the head from side to side) I dunno!
Q. How do you kill a blonde?
A. Put spikes in their shoulder pads.
Q. How do blondes pierce their ears?
A. They put tacks in their shoulder pads.
Q. What do you call a brunette with a blonde on either side?
A. An interpreter.
Q. What do you call a blonde between two brunettes?
A. A mental block.
Q. What do blondes do with their assholes in the morning?
A. Pack their lunch and send them to work.
Q. Why do blondes have more fun?
A1. Because they don't know any better.
A2. They are easier to keep amused.
Q. How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb?
A1. "What's a light bulb?"
A2. One. She holds the bulb and the world revolves around her.
A3. Two. One to hold the Diet Pepsi, and one to call, "Daaady!"