"Your Butts Getting Big Hun" joke
Alan and his wife, Debbie, are working in the garden. Debbie bends over to rip up weeds.
'Wow, Debbie,' Alan says. 'Your butt is getting really wide.'
'No, it's not!' Debbie says.
Debbie walks towards the barbecue grill to throw the weeds in a trash can.
'Your butt is getting so big that it's almost wider than the grill!' Alan says.
He gets a tape measure and measures Debbie and the grill.
'Ha,' Alan says. 'Your butt's the same exact size as the grill!'
Debbie ignores Alan's comments and refuses to speak to him for three days. On the fourth night, they're lying in bed watching television.
'I could sure use some lovin',' Alan says.
Debbie looks over at him and yells, 'Don't think for one minute that I'm going to fire up this big grill for one little weenie!'
Three ministers - a Presbyterian, a Methodist, and a Baptist - and their wives were on a cruise. A tidal wave came up and swamped the ship; they all drowned, and before long, they were standing before St. Peter.
First came the Presbyterian and his wife. St. Peter more...
2 Scousers are riding along the M62 from Manchester to Liverpool on a motorbike. They break down and start hitching a lift. A friendly trucker stops to see if he can help and the scousers ask him for a lift.
He tells them he has no room in the wagon as he is carrying 20, more...
Knock Knock
Who's there!
Duncan!
Duncan who?
Duncan make your garden grow better! Knock Knock
Who's there!
Duncan!
Duncan who?
Duncan disorderly again! Knock Knock
Who's there!
Duncan!
Duncan who?
Duncan buscuits in more...
Dear Mom and Dad,
Our scoutmaster told us all to write to our parents in case you saw the flood on TV and worried. We are OK. Only one of our tents and two of our sleeping bags got washed away. Luckily none us got drowned because we were all up on the mountain looking for more...
What is the definition of eternity?
Four blondes in four cars at a four way intersection.