Alaska Jokes / Recent Jokes

A new poll says that 7 out of 10 Americans feel that Sarah Palin is unqualified to be president.
Of her PTA.

Sarah Palin has taken to her Facebook page to demand that PresidentObama fire his chief of staff Rahm Emanuel for referring to a plan thatwould attack Democrats who are opposed to health care legislation as"f----ing retarded". Palin says Emanuel's remark was disparaging tothe disabled. She went on to say that Emanuel could have more properlyand sensitively emphasized his point by saying that the plan was"fucking mentally challenged."

The Republican party spent $150,000 in two months on clothes, hair styling, and accessories for Sarah Palin. Today Barack Obama denied he was referring to Palin when he said, "You can put lipstick and a $5,000 Oscar de la Renta dress on a pig, but it's still a pig."

These two guys had both just gotten divorced and they swore they would never have anything to do with women again.
They were best friends and they decided to move up to Alaska as far north as they could go and never look at a woman again.
They got up there and went into a trader's store and told him, "Give us enough supplies to last two men for one year."
The trader got the gear together and on top of each one's supplies he laid a board with a hole in it with fur around the hole.
The guys said "What's that board for?"
The trader said, "Well, where you're going there are no women and you might need this."
They said "No way! We've sworn off women for life!" The trader said," Well, take the boards with you and if you don't use them I'll refund your money next year.
"Okay," they said and left.
Next year this guy came into the trader's store and said "Give me enough supplies to last one man more...

Newly released academic research from the University of South Florida suggests that Sarah Palin's attractiveness hurt her ability to gain votes this past election.
However, this finding has to be taken with a grain of salt; researchers admitted that whenever they attempted to factor in Palin's apparent disregard for wildlife, the environment, women's health, foreign policy and all-around glaring lack of intellectual curiosity, their interns kept bursting into flame.

Sarah Palin announced she’ll write a memoir. In the book, to be entitled, Gosh Golly, You Betcha, Palin tells how a woman with a severely limited vocabulary almost became Vice President of the United States.

Sarah Palin.
Ted Stevens.
Anyone have the receipt so we can return Alaska to Russia and get a refund?