Alice Jokes / Recent Jokes

A group of young children were sitting in a circle with their teacher. She was going around in turn asking them all questions."Davey, what sound does a cow make?"
Davey replied, "It goes' moo'.""Alice, what sound does a cat make?"
Alice said, "It goes' meow'.""Jamie, what sound does a lamb make?"
Jamie said, "It goes' baaa'.""Jennifer, what sound does a mouse make?"
Jennifer paused, and said, "Uhh... it goes...' click'!"

Knock Knock Who's there! Alice! Alice who? Alice N. Tew if you'll listen to me!

Alice and Peter were having dinner, when Alice said, "While I was downtown this morning, I met a horribly rude man. I knew immediately that he was a troublemaker. He started to insult me, used very bad language, and even threatened me."
"How did you meet this guy?" Peter asked.
"Well, we met by accident," Alice replied. "I hit him with the car."

Alice works in a chemists on Saturdays with her dad who is the pharmacist. One weekend, her dad decides to have the morning off and to leave Alice to mind the shop.
"Now, pay attention," he says. "Under the counter are two piles of brown paper bags with condoms in them. If a man comes in and asks for a