Ambition Jokes / Recent Jokes

Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy.

An executive will always return to work from lunch early if no one takes him.

An error in the premise will appear in the conclusion.

An object at rest will always be in the wrong place.

An object in motion will always be headed in the wrong direction.

An original idea can never emerge from committee in its original form.

An ounce of application is worth a ton of abstraction.

An ounce of pretension is worth a pound of manure.

An ounce of rejection is worse than a pound of "sure".

Any argument carried far enough will end up in semantics.

An army Major visits the sick soldiers, goes up to one private and asks -
"What's your problem, Soldier?"
"Chronic syphilis, Sir!"
"What treatment are you getting?"
"Five minutes with the wire brush each day, Sir!"
"What's your ambition?"
"To get back to the front lines, Sir!"
"Good man!" says the Major.

He goes to the next bed.
"What's your problem, Soldier?"
"Chronic piles, Sir!"
"What treatment are you getting?"
"Five minutes with the wire brush each day, Sir!"
"What's your ambition?"
"To get back to the front lines, Sir!"
"Good man!" says the Major.

He goes to the next bed.
"What's your problem, Soldier?"
"Chronic gum disease, Sir!"
"What treatment are you getting?"
"Five minutes with the wire brush more...

An army Major visits the sick soldiers, goes up to one private and asks -

“What’s your problem, Soldier? ”

“Chronic syphilis, Sir! ”

“What treatment are you getting? ”

“Five minutes with the wire brush each day, Sir! ”

“What’s your ambition? ”

“To get back to the front lines, Sir! ”

“Good man! ” says the Major.

He goes to the next bed.

“What’s your problem, Soldier? ”

“Chronic piles, Sir! ”

“What treatment are you getting? ”

“Five minutes with the wire brush each day, Sir! ”

“What’s your ambition? ”

“To get back to the front lines, Sir! ”

“Good man! ” says the Major.

He goes to the next bed.

“What’s your problem, Soldier? ”

“Chronic gum disease, Sir! ”

“What treatment are you getting? more...

An army Major visiting the sick soldiers, went to one private and asked, "What's your problem, Soldier?"

"Chronic syphilis, Sir."
"What treatment are you getting?"
"Five minutes with the wire brush each day."
"What's your ambition?"
"To get back to the front, Sir."
"Good man," said the Major.

He went to the next bed, "What's your problem, Soldier?"
"Chronic piles, Sir."
"What treatment are you getting?"
"Five minutes with the wire brush each day."
"What's your ambition?"
"To get back to the front, Sir."
"Good man," barked the Major.

He moved to the next bed, "What's your problem, Soldier?"
"Chronic gum disease, Sir"
"What treatment are you getting?"
"Five minutes with the wire brush each more...

Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.

"The gene pool could use a little chlorine." "All generalizations are false." "Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine." "Time is what keeps everything from happening at once." "I love cats... they taste just like chicken""Out of my mind. Back in five minutes." "Seen on an old, beat-up car: "This is not an abandoned vehicle." "Forget the Joneses, I keep up with the Simpsons." "Born Free.. . . . Taxed to Death""Cover me. I'm changing lanes." "As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools""Happiness is a belt-fed weapon""The more people I meet, the more I like my dog." "Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot." "Conserve toilet paper, use both sides." "REHAB is for quitters""I get enough exercise just pushing my luck!""Sometimes I wake up grumpy; Other times I let her more...

An army Major visiting sick soldiers, goes up to one private and asks "What's your problem, Soldier?"
"Chronic syphilis, Sir"
"What treatment are you getting?"
"Five minutes with the wire brush each day."
"What's your ambition?"
"To get back to the front, Sir"
"Good man." says the Major. He goes to the next bad. "What's your problem, Soldier?"
"Chronic piles, Sir"
"What treatment are you getting?"
"Five minutes with the wire brush each day."
"What's your ambition?"
"To get back to the front, Sir."
"Good man." says the Major. He goes to the next bed. "What's your problem, Soldier?"
"Chronic gum disease, Sir."
"What treatment are you getting?"
"Five minutes with the wire brush each day."
"What's your ambition?"
"To get the wire more...