Ant Jokes / Recent Jokes

THE ORIGINAL VERSIONThe ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies out in the cold. MODERN CANADIAN VERSIONThe ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come the winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving. The CBC shows up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food. Canadians are stunned by the sharp contrast. How can it be that, in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to more...

1. Where do ants go for their holidays?
Frants!

2. What do you call an ant who skips school?
A truant!

3. What do you get if you cross some ants with some tics?
All sorts of antics!

4. What do you call a greedy ant?
An anteater!

5. Why did the elephant put his trunk across the path?
To trip up the ants!

6. What is even bigger than an elephant?
A giant!

7. What do you call an ant in space?
Cosmonants & Astronants!

8. What do you call an ant from overseas?
Impartant!

9. What medicine would you give an ill ant?
Antibiotics!

10. What is smaller than an ant`s dinner?
An ant`s mouth!

1. What do you call an ant who lives with your great uncle?
Your great-ant!

2. Who was the most famous ant scientist?
Albert Antstein!

3. What games to ants play with elephants?
Squash!

4. What do you call a 100 year old ant?
An antique!

5. What kind of ant can you colour with?
A crayant!

6. Who is the most famous French ant?
Napoleant!

7. Why did the ant-elope?
Nobody gnu!

8. What is the biggest ant in the world?
An elephant!

9. Why don`t anteaters get sick?
Because they are full of antibodies!

10. What do you call an ant who likes to be alone?
An independant!

Millions of ants we heading towards to a jungle in a line surching for food. But one single ant was running opposite direction with lot of fuss!! Some ants tried to stop him but it was running in greater speed as there is some thing seriously wrong in the jungle where all of them going.
Finally the running ant was stopped by some other ants and asked it - why are you running other way? any thing wrong over there? Yes, an lady elephant was raped over there! lot of blood every where!
Then why are you running?
Everybody suspecting me! !

What do you call an ant with frogs legs? An antphibian.

1. Where do ants go to eat?
At a restaurant!

2. What do you call an ant with five pairs of eyes?
Antteneye!

3. What do you call an and with frogs legs?
An antphibian!

4. What kind of ants are very learned?
Pedants!

5. What do you call a smart ant?
Elegant!

6. What do you call an ant who can`t play the piano?
Discordant!

7. What kind of ant is good at maths?
An accountant!

8. How come if ants are always so busy they always get time to show up at picnics?
How many ants are needed to fill an apartment?
Ten ants!

Elephant: i heard you had dinner with the monkey last night ant: thats right elephant: er... how come you invited him, you know he eats like there's no tomorrow he stuffs himself and asks for seconds and thirds! Ant: yes, i know! That's what i was counting on... We had spinach pie! Not banana pie!