Army Jokes / Recent Jokes
Paddy' n' Mick join the army, and are put on street patrol in a city with a military curfew. They are given instructions to shoot anybody who's on the streets after 6 o'clock. So one day, they're out at twenty to 6, when Paddy spots a man walking on the other side of the street. He lines up the man in his sights and shoots the man dead. Mick is shocked. "What are you doin', Paddy? It ain't 6 yet!" "I know what I'm doin'. I know where he lives and he wouldn't have made it!"
The difficult we do immediately. The impossible takes a little while longer. - Navy Seabees
Aftrer serving in Afganistan, some GIs were were lucky to spend the festive season with their families. The lucky ones were in Germany to catch the connecting flight to the USA. Yet there was a considerable dealy in waiting. Hence, the last remaining nine Officers were requested to share a large army style room.
There were three of each from the Army, Ari Force and Navy respectively. As allocated they grouped into three sections of the same hall. When they were about to settle in their beds an actractive young blond was also brought to the very place as there were no accomadation anywhere else. The co-operative entertainer, did not mind in sharing the same hall as there was no other alaternative.
Following morning at the breakfast the waiter asked each group what they would like to drink. The Army, Air Force and Navy settled down with black coffee. The blond ordered, Indian Tea with no milk and suger. The the waiter asked how come she not settle for coffee. She promptly more...
There was this hooker who mistook a Salvation Army man fora soldier and propositioned him. The Salvation Army gent said, "Ma'am, you may be forgiven, as a pitiable victim of circumstances. Tell me, are you familiar with the concept of 'original sin'?"The hooker replied, "Well, maybe and maybe not. But ifit's "really" original, it'll cost you an extra $20."
ARMY: It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed.