Axes Jokes

A hunter went hunting for a gorilla. He brought three axes. He threw one axe but the gorilla caught it. Then he threw another axe. But the gorilla caught it. Then he threw the third axe. But he missed. But why and how did the gorilla die?
The gorilla beat himself with the axes!

One day the poor wood cutter lost his axe in the stream. As no way to continue his living without an axe he sat down under a tree andstarted crying and praying for the Lord.
The Lord appeared in front of him and promised that he will find the axe in a miniute.
The Lord jumped to the water and brought up an golden axe. "Is this your's?" The man said' No". "Keep it" the Lord said.
The Lord jumped to the water again and brought an silver axe. "Is this yours" "No" the man said. "Keep it" the Lord said and jumped to the water again.
This time the Lord brought up the real axe and the happy man went home with all three axes with him.
After few days he lost his wife in the stream and kept crying and praying near the stream. The Lord appears in front of him and promised he will find his wife in a minute. The lord jumped to the water and brought Jenifer Lopez out of the stream in few seconds.
"Is this your more...

By Andrew Marlatt
Sunday, February 10, 2002; Page B05
Bitter after being snubbed for membership in the "Axis of Evil," Libya, China and Syria today announced they had formed the Axis of Just as Evil, which they said would be "way eviler" than the Iran-Iraq-North Korea axis President Bush warned of in his State of the Union address.
Axis of Evil members immediately dismissed the new axis as having, for starters, a really dumb name.
"Right. They are Just as Evil... in their dreams!" declared North Korean President Kim Jong Il. "Everybody knows we're the best evils....I mean the best at being evil....We're the best."
Diplomats from Syria denied they were jealous over being excluded, although they conceded they did ask if they could join the Axis of Evil. "They told us it was full," said Syrian President Bashar Assad.
"An Axis can't have more than three countries," explained Iraqi President Saddam Hussein. more...