Borrow Jokes / Recent Jokes

Can I borrow that book of yours How To Become A Millionaire? Sure. Here you are. Thanks - but half the pages are missing. What's the matter? Isn't half a million enough for you?

Borrow money from a pessimist, they don't expect it back.

An Indian man walked into a bank in New York City and asks for a loan. He told the loan officer that he is going to India on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5, 000.
The bank officer told him that the bank will need some form of security for the loan. So the Indian man handed over the keys of his new Ferrari parked on the street in front of the bank. He produceed the title and everything checked out. The loan officer agreeed to accept the car as collateral for the loan.
The bank's president and its officers all enjoyed a good laugh at the Indian for using a $250, 000 Ferrari as collateral against a $5, 000 loan.
An employee of the bank then drew the Ferrari into the bank's underground garage and parked it there.
Two weeks later, the Indian returned, repayed the $5, 000 and the interest, which comes to $15. 41.
The loan officer said, "Sir, we are very happy
to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we more...

I wish I was one of your tears, so I could be born in your eye, run down your cheek, and die on your lips.
Did you know they changed the alphabet? They put U and I together.
Can I borrow that quarter, 'cause my mom told me to call home when I fell in love
What's wrong? You're looking a little sad and gloomy. What you need is some vitamin me.
Are your legs tired? 'cause you been running through my mind ALL day long.
Are you lost? 'cause it's so strange to see an angel so far from heaven.
Is your father a thief? 'cause he stole the sparkle from the stars, and put it in your eyes. (yo, watch out though, and be prepared with a snappy answer just in case she says 'yes')
Do you believe in love at first sight, or do I have to walk by you again?
What's that in your eye? Oh...it's a sparkle.
If I said you were an angel, would you treat me like the devil tonight?
Can I see that label? I just wanted to know if you were made in heaven.
Do you like more...

I wish I was one of your tears, so I could be born in your eye, run down your cheek, and die on your lips.
Did you know they changed the alphabet? They put U and I together.
Can I borrow that quarter, 'cause my mom told me to call home when I fell in love
What's wrong? You're looking a little sad and gloomy. What you need is some vitamin me.
Are your legs tired? 'cause you been running through my mind ALL day long.
Are you lost? 'cause it's so strange to see an angel so far from heaven.
Is your father a thief? 'cause he stole the sparkle from the stars, and put it in your eyes. (yo, watch out though, and be prepared with a snappy answer just in case she says 'yes')
Do you believe in love at first sight, or do I have to walk by you again?
What's that in your eye? Oh...it's a sparkle.
If I said you were an angel, would you treat me like the devil tonight?
Can I see that label? I just wanted to know if you were made in heaven.
Do you like more...

I wish I was one of your tears, so I could be born in your eye, run down your cheek, and die on your lips.Did you know they changed the alphabet? They put U and I together.Can I borrow that quarter, 'cause my mom told me to call home when I fell in loveWhat's wrong? You're looking a little sad and gloomy. What you need is some vitamin me.Are your legs tired? 'cause you been running through my mind ALL day long.Are you lost? 'cause it's so strange to see an angel so far from heaven.Is your father a thief? 'cause he stole the sparkle from the stars, and put it in your eyes. (yo, watch out though, and be prepared with a snappy answer just in case she says 'yes')Do you believe in love at first sight, or do I have to walk by you again? What's that in your eye? Oh...it's a sparkle.If I said you were an angel, would you treat me like the devil tonight? Can I see that label? I just wanted to know if you were made in heaven.Do you like raisins? How about a date? So... How am I doin'? I miss my more...

A man walks into a New York bank, and says he's going to Europe for two weeks and needs to borrow $5000. For collateral, he offers his new Rolls Royce.

The bank is satisfied and parks it in their secured underground garage. Two weeks later to the day, the man returns to the bank, repays the $5000 and interest of $15. 41.

The loan officer says inquiringly, "Sir, we were delighted to have your business but, in checking your credit, we learned you are a multimillionaire. Why ever did you need to borrow $5000?"

"Where else in New York can I park my car for two weeks for $15. 41?"