Bumper Jokes / Recent Jokes
The funniest bumper sticker is:
Keep honking I'm reloading!
Humor: More Bumper Stickers
1. Constipated People Don't Give A Crap.
2. Practice Safe Sex, Go Screw Yourself.
3. If You Drink Don't Park, Accidents Cause People.
4. Who Lit The Fuse On Your Tampon?
5. If You Don't Believe In Oral Sex, Keep Your Mouth Shut.
6. Please Tell Your Pants Its Not Polite To Point.
7. If That Phone Was Up Your Butt, Maybe You Could Drive A Little Better.
8. My Kid Got Your Honor Roll Student Pregnant.
9. Thank You For Pot Smoking.
10. To All You Virgins Thanks For Nothing.
11. If At First You Don't Succeed... blame Someone Else And Seek Counseling.
12. Impotence: Nature's Way Of Saying "No Hard Feelings".
13. If You Can Read This, I've Lost My Trailer.
14. Horn Broken... Watch For Finger.
15. It's Not How You Pick Your Nose, But Where You Put The Booger.
16. If You're Not A Hemorrhoid, Get Off My Ass.
17. You're Just Jealous Because The Voices Are Talking To more...
My karma ran over your dogma.
Cover me. I'm changing lanes.
I'm in no hurry, I'm on my way to work.
Hey idiot, hang up! You are driving a car, not a phone booth.
Take your time, but hurry.
Speed kills, drive slow, get a Honda.
0 to 60... in 15 minutes.
If you don't like my driving, stay off the footpath.
Why am I the only person on earth that knows how to drive?
Forget about world peace... visualize using your turn signal.
As a matter of fact, I DO own the road.
Evacuate the road!!! STUDENT driving!!
Go on speeding, we'll cut you out (of your car ) - Your Fire Dept.
Caution: Driver Sleeping.
Don't Think and Drive.
Caution I swerve and hit people at random.
So many pedestrians, so little time.
Faster than a speeding ticket.
Caution: I drive like you do
The driver has no money, he's married.
Stop reading my bumper stickers and pay attention to the road! :D
Bumper Sticker:
If all else fails
read the instructions
(The Bible)
Bumper Sticker:
Prepare for your FINALS
Read the Bible
Clara: My pastor is so good he can talk on any subject for an hour.
Sarah: That's nothing! My pastor can talk for an hour without a subject!
At an atheist funeral: Here lies an atheist, all dressed up and nowhere to go.
The other day I saw a ''Honk if you love Jesus'' bumper sticker. I was feeling particularly sassy that day because I had just come from a thrilling choir performance followed by a thunderous prayer meeting, so I bought the sticker and put it on my bumper. Boy, am I glad I did! What an uplifting experience that followed! I was stopped at a red light at a busy intersection, just lost in thought about the Lord, and how good He is... and I didn't notice that the light had changed.It is a good thing someone else loves Jesus because if he hadn't honked, I'd never have noticed! I found that LOTS of people love Jesus! Why, while I was sitting there, the guy behind me started honking like crazy, and then he leaned out of his window and screamed, ''For the love of GOD! GO, GO! Jesus Christ, GO!!'' What an exuberant cheerleader he was for Jesus! Everyone started honking! I just leaned out of my window and started waving and smiling at all these loving people. I even honked my horn a few times to more...
Your truck has a bumper sticker that reads, "Gun control is a steady hand."
Your wife has ever torn her hose on the boogers stuck under the front of the pickup seat.
You have ever had a special loaded gun by the back door only for use on possums.
I've recently seen 2 bumper stickers that I just love. They've also been known to be true!
"LIVE, FREEZE, AND DIE
New Hampshire"
(takeoff on the "Live Free or Die" motto of NH) and
"VERRRRMONT
Some Like it Cold"