Burger Jokes / Recent Jokes

What system do they teach in Hamburger High's math courses? The meatric system, silly!

When can you count on a hamburger in an emergency? When the chips are down!

When do burgers quit their jobs? The day they decide to meat LOAF!

When do hamburgers most enjoy watching TV? During PRIME time!

Great A Hot & Juicy Story Well, I was loafin' around the salad bar at the burger stand one chili day on Coney Island, when I Frito-Lay'd my eyes on the sweetest little tomato I'd ever seen. Let's just say I could tell she wasn't gonna be ice-cold or taste like some of those cheaper spreads I'd eaten. So I mustard up my courage and I whispered, "Hey, Mama Bird! You got a sweet set of sesame-seed buns, and I'd live to bury my open-face in your McMuffin snack pack. And maybe later I could drive-in my Jumbo Jack in your Box. So, what's your name, anyway?" "Wendy," she replied, and said that her buns were always hot and fresh. Well, it seemed like an invitation to me, so I unzipped my French-fly, pulled down my hash-browns and whipped out my Quarter-Pounder. She took one look at my foot-long Weinerschnitzel and said, "Holy enchirito, what a Whopper! I haven't seen a sausage and a pair of McNuggets like that since I was in the sack with Long John Silver over at the more...

When does a hamburger wear a look like a smile button? When somebody says,' Well done'!

When the crooked hamburger took it on the' lamb', where did it go? Oh,' ewe' know!