Camp Jokes / Recent Jokes

Camp Woodland was across the road from a dairy farm. One day the kids saw a large bull.' Is that bull safe?' someone asked the farmer.' Safer than you are!' was his answer.

Two guys decide to go on a hunting trip. When there friend hears about it, he begges to go. The two men are skeptical, because every time there friend goes, he scares away all the game. The friend promises that if he is allowed to go, he will stay at the camp site, because he likes to camp more than hunt. They agree and they start on their trip.
Once camp is set up, the two men decide to go hunt, and their friend stays behind. After several hours they finally spot a ten point buck, but a shrill scream scares the buck away. The two men run back to camp, only to find their friend standing there looking up into the trees.
"What's wrong?" They asked.
"Yeah, you scared off our game."
"I'm sorry, fellas. I didn't screm when the snake fell out of the tree and wrapped aound my neck. I didn't yell when the bear came out of the woods and mauled me nearly to death. But those SQUIRELS..."
What had happened to the poor man was that two squirels had more...

Two guys decide to go on a hunting trip. When there friend hears about it, he begges to go. The two men are skeptical, because every time there friend goes, he scares away all the game. The friend promises that if he is allowed to go, he will stay at the camp site, because he likes to camp more than hunt. They agree and they start on their trip.
Once camp is set up, the two men decide to go hunt, and their friend stays behind. After several hours they finally spot a ten point buck, but a shrill scream scares the buck away. The two men run back to camp, only to find their friend standing there looking up into the trees.
"What's wrong?" They asked. "Yeah, you scared off our game."
"I'm sorry, fellas. I didn't screm when the snake fell out of the tree and wrapped aound my neck. I didn't yell when the bear came out of the woods and mauled me nearly to death. But those SQUIRELS..."
What had happened to the poor man was that two squirels had more...

Two guys decide to go on a hunting trip. When there friend hears about it, he begges to go. The two men are skeptical, because every time there friend goes, he scares away all the game. The friend promises that if he is allowed to go, he will stay at the camp site, because he likes to camp more than hunt. They agree and they start on their trip.Once camp is set up, the two men decide to go hunt, and their friend stays behind. After several hours they finally spot a ten point buck, but a shrill scream scares the buck away. The two men run back to camp, only to find their friend standing there looking up into the trees."What's wrong?" They asked. "Yeah, you scared off our game.""I'm sorry, fellas. I didn't screm when the snake fell out of the tree and wrapped aound my neck. I didn't yell when the bear came out of the woods and mauled me nearly to death. But those SQUIRELS..."What had happened to the poor man was that two squirels had climbed up his pants more...

Two privates stationed at Fort Campbell were handed shovels and told to bury a large, dead animal. While digging they got into an argument about what they were burying.
"This here's a big mule!" "This ain't no mule, this here's a donkey."
"Mule!"
"Donkey!"
Well, this went on for a while until the camp chaplain came by.
"What are you boys doing?"
"We're diggin' a grave for this mule."
"Donkey, dammit!"
The chaplain cut in, "Boys, this isn't either one, it's an ass!"
An hour later, the camp commander came up and said, "What are you men doing, digging a foxhole?"
"No sir, we're diggin' an asshole."

The following appeared in a computer magazine in Mr. Dvorak's column:
Dear Mr. Dvorak:
Ann Landers wouldn't print this. I have nowhere else to turn. I have to get the word out. Warn other
parents. I must be rambling on. Let me try and explain. It's about my son, Billy. He's always been a
good, normal ten year old boy. Well, last spring we sat down after dinner to select a summer camp for
Billy. We sorted through the camp brochures. There were the usual camps with swimming, canoeing,
games, singing by the campfire -- you know.
There were sports camps and specialty camps for weight reduction, music, military camps and camps
that specialized in Tibetan knot tying. I tried to talk him into Camp Winnepoopoo. It's where he went
last year. (He made an adorable picture out of painted pinto beans and macaroni). Billy would have
none of it. Billy pulled a brochure out of his pocket. It was for a COMPUTER CAMP! We should have put
our foot more...

A kid at a sleep-away camp wrote home,"Please send me some food. All they serve here are meals."