Cares Jokes / Recent Jokes
81. Q: What do you call a hooker and four blondes?
A: Regular price, four bucks, four bucks, four bucks, four bucks.
82. Q: Why is a blonde like a door knob?
A:' Cause everybody gets a turn.
83. Q: Why is a blonde like railroad tracks?
A:' Cause she's been laid all over the country.
84. Q: What important question does a blonde ask his/her mate before having sex?
A: Do you want this by the hour, or the flat rate?
85. Q: Why do blonde girls have trouble achieving orgasm?
A: *Who cares?*
86. Q: Why do blonds have orgasms?
A: So they know when to stop having sex!
87. Q: How do you tell when a blonde reaches orgasm????
A1: She drops her nail-file!!!
A2: Who cares?
A3: She say' Next'
A4: The next person in the queue taps you on the shoulder
A5: He's had his clothes for about 2 minutes
A6: The batteries have run more...
81. Q: What do you call a hooker and four blondes? A: Regular price, four bucks, four bucks, four bucks, four bucks. 82. Q: Why is a blonde like a door knob? A:' Cause everybody gets a turn. 83. Q: Why is a blonde like railroad tracks? A:' Cause she's been laid all over the country. 84. Q: What important question does a blonde ask his/her mate before having sex? A: Do you want this by the hour, or the flat rate? 85. Q: Why do blonde girls have trouble achieving orgasm? A: *Who cares?*86. Q: Why do blonds have orgasms? A: So they know when to stop having sex! 87. Q: How do you tell when a blonde reaches orgasm???? A1: She drops her nail-file!!! A2: Who cares? A3: She say' Next' A4: The next person in the queue taps you on the shoulder A5: He's had his clothes for about 2 minutes A6: The batteries have run out. 88. Q: Why don't blondes call 911 in an emergency? A1: They can't remember the number. A2: She can't find the number 11 on the telephone buttons. 89. Q: What does a blonde say more...
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.
One day a guy dies and finds himself in hell. As he is wallowingin despair, he has his first meeting with The Devil.
The Devil: Why so sad?
Guy: Why do you think? I'm in hell.
The Devil: Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here... Do you drink?
Guy: Sure, I love to drink.
The Devil: Well you're gonna love Mondays. On Mondays that's all we do is drink. Whiskey, brandy, rum, tequila, beer...we drink until we throw up and then we drink some more! It doesn't matter because you're already dead!
Guy: That sounds great.
The Devil: Do you smoke?
Guy: Yes.
The Devil: You're going to love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars from all over the world and smoke our lungs out! If you get cancer - who cares! You're already dead!
Guy: Wow!
The Devil: Do you gamble?.
Guy: I do.
The Devil: Wednesdays you can gamble all youwant...blackjack, roulette, poker, whatever... If you lose yourshirt...who cares!
Guy: Amazing!
The Devil: more...
Q: How do you tell when a blonde reaches orgasm?
A1: She drops her nail-file!
A2: Who cares?
A3: She says, “Next”.
A4: The next person in the queue taps you on the shoulder.
A5: He’s had his clothes for about 2 minutes.
A6: I mean, who really cares?
A7: The batteries have run out.
QUESTION: How many dogs are needed to change a light bulb?
Golden Retriever:
The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned out bulb?
Border Collie:
Just one. And then I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.
Dachshund:
You know I can't reach that damned stupid lamp!
Rottweiler:
Make me.
Lab:
Oh, me, me!!! Pleeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I?
Malamute:
Let the Border Collie do it. You can feed me while he's busy.
Jack Russell Terrier:
I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the walls and furniture.
Poodle:
I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.
Cocker Spaniel:
Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.
Doberman Pinscher:
While it's dark, I'm going to sleep on the more...