Chad Jokes / Recent Jokes
One sunny day "Chad" asked his girl "Jalysa"
When he could hit it she said o a bout thirteen years so "Chad" said "damn..hey baby are you a south sider"? "Jalisa said no baby why"? "Chad said o because youve been telling me thirteen year for thirteen years ever since ive known you and you must like my balls being blue.
Chad nervously approached his girlfriend's father and said "Excuse me, Mr. Scott, but there was something I wanted to ask you."
"Well, of course, young man!" the proud father replied. "You have my full blessing. My daughter's happiness is all I want."
"Blessing, sir?" Chad stammered.
"Yes, of course. You want to marry my daughter, right?" Mr. Scott said.
"Uh, no sir, that's not it." said Chad. "Actually, my car payment is due, and I'm a little short until payday, and I wanted to know if I could borrow fifty dollars until Friday."
"Heck no!" yelled Mr. Scott. "I hardly know you."
Two husbands were discussing their married lives. Although happily married, they admitted that there were arguments sometimes. The Chad said, "I`ve made one great discovery. I know how to always have the last word."
"Wow!` said Sherman, "how did you manage that?"
"It`s easy," replied Chad. "My last word is always ˜Yes, Dear.`"
Knock Knock
Who's there!
Chad!
Chad who?
Chad to make your acquaintance!
Every Chad down in Chadville liked voting a lot.
But the Grinch, from North Chadville, most certainly did not!
The Grinch hated voting! He thought it a bore.
Now, please don't ask why. Could be Bush, could be Gore.
It could be his heart bled with liberal mush.
It could be, perhaps, that he listened to Rush.
But I think the real reason his trust was so shattered
Was the great Grinchy view that his vote never mattered.
Whatever the reason, Lack of trust, lack of goals,
The Grinch dreaded that day when Chads went to the polls.
He just hated those speeches and negative ads,
And when push came to shove, he just hated the Chads.
He just hated their theme parks, their football-team rooters,
He just hated their gun laws, their barmaids at Hooters.
He just hated their weather, even hated their hate.
And he hated that they were a battleground state.
"So they're making their choices," he snarled with a more...
Chad was admitted to the hospital for a complete check-up. At 11:30AM, they brought him some soup for lunch, which he flatly refused. At 2:00PM, they again attempted to serve him some soup, which he refused.
Again, at 4:30PM and 7:00PM, they tried to serve him some soup and he turned it down both times, so they gave up.
In preparation for the following day's tests, they entered his room at 3:00AM, 4:30AM, and 6:00AM and administered an enema each time.
When Chad returned home from the hospital after all the tests had been done, he said to his wife, "Honey, whatever you do, if you ever have to go to that hospital and they try to serve you soup, take it! If you refuse it, they sneak in while you're sleeping and shove it up your ass!"
Knock Knock Who's there! Chad! Chad who? Chad to make your acquaintance!