Chief Jokes / Recent Jokes

A man was sailing down the river amazon in a canoe, when he was hit by a poison dart. He woke up some time later in a cage, surrounded by a tribe chief and his minions. The chief said "You have been tresspassing on our tribes private property. You will be doomed to death by ravens pecking out your insides. However, if you pass our 2 tests, you will be allowed to go. The first of which is a test of courage, of bravery, of strength. You must go into the first tent, and there you will find a lion, a lion with a thorn in its paw. The second challenge is one of compassion, thought and love. You must shag the 10 most beautiful ladies of our tribe. Now, let the challenges begin..."
The man goes into the tent and at first, there is much roaring and howling, but eventually it calms down. Then the man comes out and says "That's the first challenge done! Now where are those 10 beautiful ladies who I must pull thorns out of their paws?"

The privilege of naming all the children of the tribe always fell to the chief. One day a small Indian boy asked him how he chose the names for all the children." Well, my son," the chief replied, "When I step out of my tepee, I name each child after the first thing I see." For instance, when a child is born and I step out of my tepee and see a pale moon rising, I say - you shall be called, Pale-Moon-Rising." "And when a child is born and I step out of my tepee and see a hawk flying over, I say - you shall be called, Hawk-Flying-Over." "So why do you ask, Big-Dog Pooping?"

Now that he has left office, the REAL story can finally be told.
Some time ago Mr. Clinton was hosting a state dinner when at the last minute his regular cook took ill and they had to get a replacement at short notice. The fellow arrived and turned out to be a very grubby looking man named Jon. The President voiced his concerns to his chief of staff but was told that this was the best they could do at such short notice.
Just before the meal, the President noticed the cook sticking his fingers in the soup to taste it and again he complained to the chief of staff about the cook, but he was told that this man was supposed to be a very good chef.
The meal went okay but the President was sure that the soup tasted a little off, and by the time dessert came, he was starting to have stomach cramps and nausea. It was getting worse and worse until finally he had to excuse himself from the state dinner to use the bathroom. Passing through the kitchen, he caught sight of the cook, more...

The young Indian boy had spent most of his life in a quandry... He felt different yet... couldn't figure why... he was just so depressed. He went to the Chief for answers... He asked the chief how his brother Red Deer Running had gotten his name...The chief answered in his typically poetic way..."When Red Deer Running was born, at the moment of his birth, the first thing his mother saw was a beautiful deer running off into the forest... and so Running Deer was named. It is the custom of our tribe to name the offspring according to the spirits in nature visiting upon the birth."Then, the boy said to the Chief... And how did my sister "Thundering Bird" get her name? The chief described again, how at the moment of her birth Thundering Bird's mother had heard a roar of thunder and looking up, saw a bird flying in the sky...The boy asked again, how his cousin "White Crouching Bear" had been given such a name... And the chief, looking down once more at the boy, more...

A newly nominated chief minister was under pressure from all his supporters to appoint them as cabinet minister. Or else!
The much harassed chief minister sought the
advice of his guru. *Very simple', replied the sage,
'select nine on three principles.'
'O holy one!' pleaded the chief minister,' please
enlighten this ignoramus on the three principles of
selection.'
'Three should be sachha - truthful.'
The chief minister looked over the list of his
supporters and crossed out all the names.
"Three should be suchha - dean.'
The chief minister took a second look at the list
and again crossed out all the names.
'Three should be luchhas - vagabonds.'
The chief minister went over the list and looked more puzzled than before.' All of them qualify under the third category. "What should I do?' he pleaded.
'Give all of them some kind of post or the other. Tell everyone that they are all luchhas and the only more...

One Day Stupid, Trouble, and Shut Up were driving along in their car when Trouble suddenly hurled himself out of the window.Well, Stupid and Shut Up did not know what to do so they went to the police station. When they got there the chief asked them their names."Shut Up", replied Shut Up."Stupid", replied Stupid.The police chief thought these people were telling him to shut up, and were calling him stupid. Which made him very mad. "Excuse Me!" shouted the chief.Thinking the chief was hard of hearing, They once again shouted there names."Shut Up!""Stupid!"The police chief was very riled. He then asked" Are you looking for trouble?"!!! Stunned at the idea of the chief knowing that they were looking for their friend, they replied,"Why yes, how did you know?"

And God Created The Woman
He was so pleased with his creation that he calls in three of his top advisors: His chief Carpenter, His Chief Tailor, and His Chief Architect.
He presents his creation to his Chiefs and asks them for suggestions and comments.
The Carpenter says: "Too many forms, you need to straighten things out, flatten it out." God replies, "No I like it that way, but thanks"
Then the Tailor says: "Too many strings (hair) sticking out, you need to trim them." God replies, "No I like it that way, but thanks"
Then the Architect says: "Wonderful creation, absolutely superb, but next time, please do not place the toilets next to the reception room"