Chip Jokes / Recent Jokes

Log On... Make the barbie hotter
Log Off... Don't add any more wood
Monitor... Keeping an eye on the barbie
Download... Get the firewood off the ute
Floppy Disc... What you get lifting too much firewood at once
Window... What you shut when it's cold
Screen... What you shut in the mozzie season
Byte... What mozzies do
Bit... What mozzies did
Mega Byte... What Townsville mozzies do
Chip... A bar snack
Micro Chip... What's left in the bag after you have eaten the chips
Modem... What you did to the lawns
Dot Matrix... Old Dan Matrix's wife
Laptop... Where the cat sleeps
Software... Plastic knives and forks you get at Big Rooster
Hardware... Real stainless steel knives and forks from K Mart
Mouse... What eats the grain in the shed
Mainframe... What holds the shed up
Web... What spiders make
Web Site... The shed or under the verandah
Cursor... The old bloke that swears a lot
Search Engine... What you do more...

Log On: Makin' the wood stove hotter.
Log Off: Don't add no wood.
Monitor: Keepin' an eye on the wood stove.
Download: Gettin' the firewood off the pickup.
Mega Hertz: When yer not careful downloadin'.
Floppy Disk: Whatcha git from pilin' too much firewood.
Ram: The hydrolic thingy that splits the firewood.
Hard Drive: Gettin' home in the winter season.
Prompt: What you wish the mail was in the winter.
Windows: What to shut when it's below 15 below.
Screen: What 'cha need for the black fly season.
Byte: That's what the flies do.
Chip: What to munch on.
Micro Chip: What's left in the bottom of the bag.
Infrared: Where the left-overs go when Fred's around.
Modem: What 'cha did to the hay fields.
Dot Matrix: Farmer Matrix's wife.
Lap Top: Where little kids feel comfy.
Keyboard: Where ya hang your keys.
Software: Them plastic eatin' utensils.
Mouse: Whats eats the horses grain.
Main Frame: Hold up the barn more...

Log On: Makin' the wood stove hotter.Log Off: Don't add no wood.Monitor: Keepin' an eye on the wood stove.Download: Gettin' the firewood off the pickup.Mega Hertz: When yer not careful down loadin'.Floppy Disk: Whatcha git from pilin' too much firewood.Ram: The hydrolic thingy that splits the firewood.Hard Drive: Getting' home in the winter season.Prompt: What you wish the mail was in the winter.Windows: What to shut when it's below 15 below.Screen: What 'cha need for the black fly season.Byte: That's what the flies do.Chip: What to munch on.Micro Chip: What's left in the bottom of the bag.Infrared: Where the left-overs go when Fred's around.Modem: What 'cha did to the hay fields.Dot Matrix: Farmer Matrix's wife.Lap Top: Where little kids feel comfy.Keyboard: Where ya hang your keys.Software: Them plastic eatin' utensils.Mouse: Whats eats the horses grain.Main Frame: Hold up the barn roof.Port: Fancy wine.Enter: C'mon in.Random Access Memory: You can't remember whatcha' paid for that more...

Log On:Making the wood stove hotter.
Log Off:Don't add wood.
Monitor:Keep an eye on the wood stove.
Download:Getting the firewood off the pickup.
Mega Hertz:When you're not careful downloading (watch the toes!)
Floppy Disk:What you get from piling too much wood.
RAM:The hydraulic thingy that makes the woodsplitter work.
Hard Drive:Getting home in mud season.
Prompt:What you wish the mail was in mud season.
Windows:What to shut when it's 30 below.
Screen:What you need for black fly season.
Byte:What black flies do.
Chip:What to munch on.
Micro Chip:What's left in the bag when the chips are gone.
Infrared:Where the leftovers go when Fred's around.
Modem:What you did to the hay fields.
Dot Matrix:Farmer Matrix's wife.
Lap Top:Where little kids feel comfy.
Keyboard:Where you hang your keys.
Software:Plastic eating utensils.
Mouse:What eats the horses' grain in the barn.
Main Frame:The part of the barn that more...

Log On: Makin' the wood stove hotter. Log Off: Don't add no wood. Monitor: Keepin' an eye on the wood stove. Download: Gettin' the firewood off the pickup. Mega Hertz: When yer not careful down loadin'. Floppy Disk: Whatcha git from pilin' too much firewood. Ram: The hydrolic thingy that splits the firewood. Hard Drive: Getting' home in the winter season. Prompt: What you wish the mail was in the winter. Windows: What to shut when it's below 15 below. Screen: What' cha need for the black fly season. Byte: That's what the flies do. Chip: What to munch on. Micro Chip: What's left in the bottom of the bag. Infrared: Where the left-overs go when Fred's around. Modem: What' cha did to the hay fields. Dot Matrix: Farmer Matrix's wife. Lap Top: Where little kids feel comfy. Keyboard: Where ya hang your keys. Software: Them plastic eatin' utensils. Mouse: Whats eats the horses grain. Main Frame: Hold up the barn roof. Port: Fancy wine. Enter: C'mon in. Random Access Memory: You can't remember more...

Q: How do you know when a blonde has been making chocolate chip cookies?A: You find M&M shells all over the kitchen floor.

Redneck computer terms

Log On: Makin' the wood stove hotter.

Log Off: Don't add no wood.

Monitor: Keepin' an eye on the wood stove.

Download: Gettin' the firewood off the pickup.

Mega Hertz: When yer not careful down loadin'.

Floppy Disk: Whatcha git from pilin' too much firewood.

Ram: The hydrolic thingy that splits the firewood.

Hard Drive: Getting' home in the winter season.

Prompt: What you wish the mail was in the winter.

Windows: What to shut when it's below 15 below.

Screen: What' cha need for the black fly season.

Byte: That's what the flies do.

Chip: What to munch on.

Micro Chip: What's left in the bottom of the bag.

Infrared: Where the left-overs go when Fred's around.

Modem: What' cha did to the hay fields.

Dot Matrix: Farmer Matrix's wife.

Lap Top: Where little kids feel more...