Cliff Jokes / Recent Jokes
One day three men named Jimmy, Mike, and Sam found a genie in a bottle and the genie will grant everyone 1 wish if they yell what they want as you jump off a cliff. The first man, Jimmy, yells "
I want a billion dollars!"
. He jumps off the cliff and lands in a billion dollars. The next man, Mike jumps off the cliff and says, "
I want gold!"
and he lands in gold. The last man, Sam, runs to the edge of the cliff, trips over a rock and says, "
oh crap!"
and lands in a pile of poop.
A man is running along and falls off a cliff - I don't know why he falls
off a cliff, he just does, OK?
As he's falling he manages to grab onto a tree about 15 feet down,
growing out from the side of the cliff. Now he's hanging there and he
looks down and sees this 200 feet drop below him, but he knows he's
only 15 feet from the top of cliff. Looking up he cries out for help,
"Is there anybody up there?"
Much to his surprise he is heard. A voice replies which can only be
that of the lord (the reverb has been turned up and there's too much
bass), "Let... go..."
The man looks down at the 200 feet drop, and then looking up once
more, cries out, "Is there anybody else up there?"
Once there was three men on a cliff. A genie appeared and said," If you jump off the cliff and say what you want to be you will turn into it. The first man jumped off and said, " I Want to be a bird" and he turned into one. the second guy jumped off and said, " I want to be a plane" and turned into one. The third men ran to jump off but tripped on a rock and said, " crap." He turned into a piece off crap.
There is a story about a monastery in Afganistan perched high on a cliff several hundred feet in the air. The only way to reach the monastery was to be suspended in a basket which was pulled to the top by several monks who pulled and tugged with all their strength. Obviously, the ride up the steep cliff in that basket was terrifying.
One tourist got exceedingly nervous about half-way up as he noticed that the rope by which he was suspended was old and frayed. With a trembling voice, he asked the monk who was riding with him in the basket how often they changed the rope.
The monk thought for a moment and answered brusquely, "Whenever it breaks."
A blonde, a brunette, and a readhead are told that if they jump off a certain cliff and say any word they want, they will turn into whatever they say.
The brunette jumps off and says "Eagle!", and she turns into an eagle and flies away.
The readhead jumps off and says "Hawk!", and she turns into a hawk and flies away.
The blonde gets a running start, trips on a rock, falls over the edge and yells "OH CRAP!"
The car sped off the highway, went through the guardrail, rolled down a cliff, bounced off a tree and finally shuddered to a stop. A passing motorist, who had witnessed the entire accident, helped the miraculously unharmed driver out of the wreck." Good lord, mister," he gasped, "are you drunk?" "Of course," said the man, brushing the dirt from his suit. "What the hell do you think I am... a stunt driver!"
A Pastor was walking past a pet shop one day when he noticed a sign in the window: "Christian Horse for Sale." Being that the Pastor owned a large ranch, he was immediately interested, and went into the shop.
The owner took the Pastor out to the back, where he saw a beautiful Arabian stallion. He agreed to allow the Pastor to take a "test run."
The Pastor grabbed the reins. "giddyap." The horse ignored him. "no, no," counseled the owner. This is a Christian horse. If you want him to move, you must say, "Praise the Lord!" The Pastor did as he was told, and the horse started off on a leisurely walk. However, he soon found that the horse would not stop. "He won't answer to 'Whoa', said the owner. It's "Amen."
The Pastor decided that he liked the horse, so he bought him and took him home to his ranch in the country. He saddled the horse up again, said, "Praise the Lord," and went riding into the more...