Coaster Jokes / Recent Jokes

Life is a roller coaster.
You can either scream every time you hit a bump or you can throw your hands up in the air and enjoy it.

Love is like a roller coaster: when it's good you don't want to get off, and when it isn't... you can't wait to throw up.

What happened?" asked the hospital visitor to the heavily bandaged man sitting up in bed.
"Well, I went to the Amusement Park at the weekend and decided to take a ride on the roller coaster. As we came up to the top of the highest loop, I noticed a little sign by the side of the track. I tried to read it but it was very small and I couldn't make it out. I was so curious that I decided to go round again, but we went by so quickly that I couldn't see what the sign said. By now, I was determined to read that sign so I went round a third time. As we reached the top, I stood up in the car to get a better view."
"And did you manage to see what the sign said this time?" asked the visitor.
"Yes."
"What did it say?"
"Don't stand up in the car!"

The Eejanaika roller coaster in Japan holds the Guinness Book record for the most inversions in a roller coaster, at 14. The ride is also a "4th dimension" coaster.

"4th dimension" refers to a design in which the seats can rotate 360 degrees in a controlled spin and is also used to describe the direction your lunch will go in after the ride.

1) Remove a beer coaster from your local bar.

2) Carefully split the beer coaster top and bottom.

3) Insert a 10 bill and reseal.

4) Return to bar.

5) Place beer coaster under glass.

6) Wait for the bar to get extremely busy.

7) Discuss in a VERY LOUD voice the adverts on TV and in the papers which says Brewery X have hidden 10 bills in their coasters.

8) Keep arguing about whether it's true or not until everyone in the bar knows what you're talking about. 9) Tear open some beer coasters; look depressed.

10) Partially tear open the one with the 10 bill in it.

11) Shout, "I've won! I've won", and wave the tenner still wedged in the beer coaster around

12) Watch every coaster in the bar get destroyed.