Comedian Jokes / Recent Jokes

My HMO is terrible. They charge me for a self-examination.It's a flat fee.-Wendy Liebman

Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?-George Carlin

A new book entitled "My Booky Wook" is a memoir that details a comedian's addictions to sex, drugs, and stand-up comedy. "I hope it's a best seller," says author Ray Ellin.

I knew this guy. He was a sound guy from Ireland.He spoke to me one day and told me he was going to apply for a job.He told me that he walked out because the guyasked me for my name and i said"Paddy Milligan". He said "How do you spell"Milligan"? he replied

I've often wanted to drown my troubles, but i can't get my wife to go swimming!

Having a dog is great, it's just the 'dog people' that freak me out. "Oh, look at her, she's precious, just like Mommy." Me?!? If I birthed something that had 8 nipples - it ain't leaving the house.

Q. Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible? A. Samson. He brought the house down.