Constant Jokes / Recent Jokes
Chocolate Chip Cookies:
Ingredients:
1.) 532.35 cm3 gluten
2.) 4.9 cm3 NaHCO3
3.) 4.9 cm3 refined halite
4.) 236.6 cm3 partially hydrogenated tallow triglyceride
5.) 177.45 cm3 crystalline C12H22O11
6.) 177.45 cm3 unrefined C12H22O11
7.) 4.9 cm3 methyl ether of protocatechuic aldehyde
8.) Two calcium carbonate-encapsulated avian albumen-coated protein
9.) 473.2 cm3 theobroma cacao
10.) 236.6 cm3 de-encapsulated legume meats (sieve size #10)
To a 2-L jacketed round reactor vessel (reactor #1) with an overall heat transfer coefficient of about 100 Btu/F-ft2-hr, add ingredients one, two and three with constant agitation. In a second 2-L reactor vessel with a radial flow impeller operating at 100 rpm, add ingredients four, five, six, and seven until the mixture is homogenous.
To reactor #2, add ingredient eight, followed by three equal volumes of the homogenous mixture in reactor #1. Additionally, add ingredient nine and ten slowly, with more...
Chocolate Chip Cookies:Ingredients:1. 532.35 cm3 gluten2. 4.9 cm3 NaHCO33. 4.9 cm3 refined halite4. 236.6 cm3 partially hydrogenated tallow triglyceride5. 177.45 cm3 crystalline C12H22O116. 177.45 cm3 unrefined C12H22O117. 4.9 cm3 methyl ether of protocatechuic aldehyde8. Two calcium carbonate-encapsulated avian albumen-coated protein9. 473.2 cm3 theobroma cacao10. 236.6 cm3 de-encapsulated legume meats (sieve size #10)To a 2-L jacketed round reactor vessel (reactor #1) with an overall heat transfer coefficient of about 100 Btu/F-ft2-hr, add ingredients one, two and three with constant agitation. In a second 2-L reactor vessel with a radial flow impeller operating at 100 rpm, add ingredients four, five, six, and seven until the mixture is homogenous. To reactor #2, add ingredient eight, followed by three equal volumes of the homogenous mixture in reactor #1. Additionally, add ingredient nine and ten slowly, with constant agitation. Care must be taken at this point in the reaction to more...
Chocolate Chip Cookies:Ingredients:1.) 532.35 cm3 gluten2.) 4.9 cm3 NaHCO33.) 4.9 cm3 refined halite4.) 236.6 cm3 partially hydrogenated tallow triglyceride5.) 177.45 cm3 crystalline C12H22O116.) 177.45 cm3 unrefined C12H22O117.) 4.9 cm3 methyl ether of protocatechuic aldehyde8.) Two calcium carbonate-encapsulated avian albumen-coated protein9.) 473.2 cm3 theobroma cacao10.) 236.6 cm3 de-encapsulated legume meats (sieve size #10)To a 2-L jacketed round reactor vessel (reactor #1) with an overall heat transfer coefficient of about 100 Btu/F-ft2-hr, add ingredients one, two and three with constant agitation. In a second 2-L reactor vessel with a radial flow impeller operating at 100 rpm, add ingredients four, five, six, and seven until the mixture is homogenous.To reactor #2, add ingredient eight, followed by three equal volumes of the homogenous mixture in reactor #1. Additionally, add ingredient nine and ten slowly, with constant agitation. Care must be taken at this point in the more...
Everyone wonders why Muslim terrorists are so
quick to commit suicide. Let's see now:
No beer, no bars, no radio, no television, no
Playboy or Penthouse, no rugby, no football, no
basketball, no baseball, no golf, no dancing, no
music.
No bikinis on the beach, no nude beaches, no mini
skirts and braless beauties.
No BBQ pork, no ham, no bacon, no hot-dogs, no
burgers, no lobster, no shellfish or even frozen
seafood sticks.
Rags for clothes and dish towels for hats.
Constant wailing from the guy next door because
he's sick and there are no doctors.
Constant wailing from the guy in the tower.
You can't shave. Your wife can't shave. You can't
even shave your wife.
Sand is everywhere. Sand gets into everything.
You wipe your backside with your left hand
without toilet paper and if they catch you stealing
they chop off your good hand and you must eat with
your more...
Katz's Law:
Men and women will act rationally towards each other only after all other possibilities have been exhausted.
Churchill's Commentary on Man:
Man will occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.
Sattinger's Law:
It works better if you plug it in.
Cahn's Axiom (aka Alien's Axiom):
When all else fails, read the instructions.
Beckhap's Law:
Beauty times brains equals a constant.
Cole's Axiom:
The sum of the intelligence on the planet is a constant; the population is growing.
Jone's Motto:
Friends come and go, but enemies accumulate.
The Ultimate Law:
All general statements are false.
Knight's Law:
Life is what happens to you when you're making other plans.
Krueger's Observation:
A taxpayer is someone who does not have to take a civil service exam in order to work for the government.
Benchley's Law of Distinction:
There are two kinds of more...
Katz's Law:
Men and women will act rationally towards each other only after all other possibilities have been exhausted.
Churchill's Commentary on Man:
Man will occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.
Sattinger's Law:
It works better if you plug it in.
Cahn's Axiom (aka Alien's Axiom):
When all else fails, read the instructions.
Beckhap's Law:
Beauty times brains equals a constant.
Cole's Axiom:
The sum of the intelligence on the planet is a constant; the population is growing.
Jone's Motto:
Friends come and go, but enemies accumulate.
The Ultimate Law:
All general statements are false.
Knight's Law:
Life is what happens to you when you're making other plans.
Krueger's Observation:
A taxpayer is someone who does not have to take a civil service exam in order to work for the government.
Benchley's Law of Distinction:
There are two kinds of more...
Katz's Law:Men and women will act rationally towards each other only after all other possibilities have been exhausted.Churchill's Commentary on Man:Man will occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.Sattinger's Law:It works better if you plug it in.Cahn's Axiom (aka Alien's Axiom):When all else fails, read the instructions.Beckhap's Law:Beauty times brains equals a constant.Cole's Axiom:The sum of the intelligence on the planet is a constant; the population is growing.Jone's Motto:Friends come and go, but enemies accumulate.The Ultimate Law:All general statements are false.Knight's Law:Life is what happens to you when you're making other plans.Krueger's Observation:A taxpayer is someone who does not have to take a civil service exam in order to work for the government.Benchley's Law of Distinction:There are two kinds of people in the world; those who believe there are two kinds of people and those who don't.Harver's Law:A more...