Creation Jokes

And God Created The WomanHe was so pleased with his creation that he calls in three of his top advisors: His chief Carpenter, His Chief Tailor, and His Chief Architect.He presents his creation to his Chiefs and asks them for suggestions and comments.The Carpenter says: "Too many forms, you need to straighten things out, flatten it out." God replies, "No I like it that way, but thanks"Then the Tailor says: "Too many strings (hair) sticking out, you need to trim them." God replies, "No I like it that way, but thanks"Then the Architect says: "Wonderful creation, absolutely superb, but next time, please do not place the toilets next to the reception room"

A scientist had been keeping a secret for over two decades - he had sucessfully cloned a human being.
He kept meticulous records, raising the clone-child in his laboratory until it was an adult. Then he made his plans to unveil his creation at a meeting of top scientists, held in the luxurious facilities of a high-rise hotel.
When the time for his presentation came, the scientist stepped to the podium. He presented his data - his pictures, his charts, his graphs - to an amazed audience. But suddenly, instead of waiting for his cue to come forward, the clone stood up where he'd been sitting, and started shouting at the scientists assembled there.
This clone was an imaginative clone. He used language that would make a sailor blush, accusing his creator and all of his colleagues of the most amazing feats of perversion and vice.
Trying to regain control, the scientist ushered the clone out of the room and up to the roof of the hotel, where he hoped the clone's shouts would more...

Pig's explanation for the creation of the Universe: The Pig Bang Theory.

A young man walks over to his father one day and asks if they could have a talk about sex. His father agrees and is eager to help his son with any questions he may have.
"Dad, what does a vagina look like before sex?" asked the son.
"Well son," answered the all knowing father. "A vagina is the most beautiful thing in creation."
"The soft folds of a vagina are softer even than the petals of a rose."
"The delicate scent of a vagina is finer than the finest french perfumes."
"The taste of a vagina, is sweeter than the purest nectar."
"All in all son, it's like I said, a vagina is the most beautiful thing in creation."
"Gee dad, a vagina sounds just great, the way you describe it."
A few moments of silence go by, then the boy asks another question.
"Dad, What does a vagina look like after sex?"
"Well son, have you ever seen a bulldog eating custard?"

A scientist had been keeping a secret for over two decades - he had sucessfully cloned a human being.He kept meticulous records, raising the clone-child in his laboratory until it was an adult. Then he made his plans to unveil his creation at a meeting of top scientists, held in the luxurious facilities of a high-rise hotel.When the time for his presentation came, the scientist stepped to the podium. He presented his data - his pictures, his charts, his graphs - to an amazed audience. But suddenly, instead of waiting for his cue to come forward, the clone stood up where he'd been sitting, and started shouting at the scientists assembled there.This clone was an imaginative clone. He used language that would make a sailor blush, accusing his creator and all of his colleagues of the most amazing feats of perversion and vice.Trying to regain control, the scientist ushered the clone out of the room and up to the roof of the hotel, where he hoped the clone's shouts would go unheard.The more...