Criminals Jokes

The best way to combat criminals is by not voting for them.

There were these 3 criminals who had just robbed a bank in Egypt. They were caught, convicted, and sentenced to exile in the Sahara Desert and they could each take only one thing. When they met in the desert they each were telling what they had brought.
"I brought a loaf of bread, so when I get hungry, I'll have something to eat," said the first criminal.
"I brought a water skin, so that when I get thirsty, I'll have something to drink," said the second.
"I brought a car door, so that when it gets hot I can roll down the window."

Little Davie's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local
police station where they saw pictures tacked to a bulletin board of the
10 most wanted criminals.
One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it really was
the photo of a wanted person. "Yes," said the policeman. "The
detectives want very badly to capture him."
Little Davie asked, "Why didn't you keep him when you took his picture?"

Three criminals escaped from jail. Each one of them had a weapon. The first one had a knife, the second one had a gun, and the first one had a bomb. they all through their weapons in the air to celebrate their prison break. Unfortunately for these criminals, they were again caught.
The cop that found the three guys wet around town for a walk. He came upon a little boy with a Knife in his hand. The boy was crying.
When the cop asked him why he was crying, the boy replied, "A knife fell from the sky and stabbed my mommy!"
The cop comforted him, took him home, and continued his walk. Again the cop came across another little crying boy with a gun this time. The cop asked him why he was crying. The little boy replied, "This gun fell from the sky and I accidentally shot my mommy!"
The cop comforted him, took him home, and again continued his walk. Again the cop came across a little boy, but he was laughing and he had no weapon. The cop asked him why he more...

The DEA has issued a warning that criminals are currently manufacturing knives that shoot bullets. A brilliant notion, really. Disguising weapons as... OTHER weapons.
The criminals are next developing a plan to disguise heroin as crack-cocaine. Genius.