Dating Jokes / Recent Jokes
When you are dating..... Farting is never an issue When you are married. ...You make sure there's nothing flammable near your husband...... at all time When you are dating..... He takes you out to have a good time When you are married. ...He brings home a 6 pack, and says "What are you going to drink?" When you are dating..... He holds your hand in public When you are married. ...He flicks your ear in public When you are dating..... A Single bed for 2 isn't THAT bad When you are married. ...A King size bed feels like an army cot When you are dating..... You are turned on at the sight of him naked When you are married. ...You think to yourself...."Was he ALWAYS this hairy????" When you are dating..... You enjoyed foreplay When you are married. ...You tell him "If we have sex, will you leave me alone???" When you are dating..... He hugs you, when he walks by you. ..for no reason When you are married. ...He grabs your boob any chance he gets When you are more...
A really promiscuous girl is one you can have a good time with even if you play your cards wrong.
Oct. 12, 2006 -- Women's skin ages faster than men's, suggests a study that used an experimental laser device to measure skin damage.
Lenny's ex-girlfriend Cindy. Age 34. Sad.
I had an ex-girlfriend who said that since there were no nicknames for the vagina that weren't sexual or degrading, women should start nicknaming theirs after female authors, i.e. "my little Jane Austen" or "my Agatha Christie."
I told her "you can call yours Sylvia Plath because it depresses the fuck out of me."
Sipping her second alexander, the green-eyed secretary demanded of her girlfriend, "You've been dating Harold since you were both kids, and the relationship doesn't seem to be going anywhere. Hasn't he any ambitions?"
"Oh, yes," smiled her sexy companion, "ever since he's been knee-high."
The wondrously stacked blonde appeared at her door in a strapless evening gown that defied gravity. "Terrific!" said her admiring escort. "I don't see what holds that dress up!"
"Play your cards right and you will," she murmured.