Deliver Jokes / Recent Jokes
31. Inform your English class that they need to know FORTRAN and
code all their essays. Deliver a lecture on output format statements.
32. Bring a small dog to class. Tell the class he's named "Boogers
McGee" and is your "mascot". Whenever someone asks a question,
walk over to the dog and ask it, "What'll be, McGee?"
33. Wear a feather boa and ask students to call you "Snuggles".
34. Claim to be a chicken. Squat, cluck, and produce eggs at irregular
intervals.
35. Bring a CPR dummy to class and announce that it will be the
teaching assistant for the semester. Assign it an office and office hours.
36. Have a grad student in a black beret pluck at a bass while you lecture.
37. Sprint from the room in a panic if you hear sirens outside.
38. Give an opening monologue. Take two minute "commercial breaks" every ten
minutes.
39. Tell students that you'll fail them if they cheat on exams more...
Santas DiversionSanta was delivering gifts as usual, when at one house a beautiful young woman wasawaiting his arrival. She begged him to stay and cuddle with her on the couch. Santa declined, saying "Ho-ho, gotta go. Gotta deliver these presents, you know." Trying again, the lovely young thing removed her clothing down to her underwear." OH Santa, won't you please stay?" she begged. Taking a long look, Santa sighedand delivered a not too believable, "Ho-ho, gotta go. Gotta deliver these presentsyou know." Not to be denied, this gorgeous female stripped off every stitch of remainingclothing, smiled and said in the sexiest voice imaginable, "Oh, Santa, pleasereconsider? Stay with me?" With a very pained look on his face, Santa groaned and said very slowly, "Ho -ho, gotta go. Gotta deliver these presents you know." And with that, he turned and left. Two minutes passed, and Santa reappeared, ploppinghimself down on the couch next to the more...
One Christmas Eve, Santa Claus comes down the chimney and is startled by a beautiful 19 year old blonde. She asks "Santa, will you stay with me?"
Santa says, "Ho Ho Ho I gotta go, gotta go!
I gotta deliver these toys to the children, y'know!"
She takes off her nightgown, and wearing only a bra and panties, she asks "Santa, now will you stay with me?"
Santa says, "Ho Ho Ho I gotta go, gotta go!
I gotta deliver these toys to the children, y'know!"
She takes off everything and asks "Santa, now will you stay with me?"
Santa replies "Hey Hey Hey I gotta stay, gotta stay!
I can't get up the chimney with my dick this way!"
One Christmas Eve, Santa Claus comes down the chimney and is startled by a beautiful 19 year old blonde. She asks "Santa, will you stay with me?"
Santa says, "Ho Ho Ho I gotta go, gotta go!
I gotta deliver these toys to the children, y'know!"
She takes off her nightgown, and wearing only a bra and panties, she asks "Santa, now will you stay with me?"
Santa says, "Ho Ho Ho I gotta go, gotta go!
I gotta deliver these toys to the children, y'know!"
She takes off everything and asks "Santa, now will you stay with me?"
Santa replies "Hey Hey Hey I gotta stay, gotta stay!
I can't get up the chimney with my dick this way!"
One Christmas Eve, Santa Claus comes down the chimney and is startled by a beautiful 19 year old blonde. She asks "Santa, will you stay with me?"Santa says, "Ho Ho Ho I gotta go, gotta go! I gotta deliver these toys to the children, y'know!"She takes off her nightgown, and wearing only a bra and panties, she asks "Santa, now will you stay with me?"Santa says, "Ho Ho Ho I gotta go, gotta go! I gotta deliver these toys to the children, y'know!"She takes off everything and asks "Santa, now will you stay with me?"Santa replies "Hey Hey Hey I gotta stay, gotta stay! I can't get up the chimney with my dick this way!"
One Christmas Eve, Santa Claus comes down the chimney and is startled by
a beautiful 19 year old blonde.
She said "Santa, will you stay with me?", Santa replied,
"Ho Ho Ho gotta go, gotta go,
gotta deliver these toys
to good girls and boys."
So she took off her night gown, wearing only a bra and panties, she
asked "Santa, now will you stay with me?"
"Ho Ho Ho gotta go, gotta go,
gotta deliver these toys
to gook girls and boys."
She takes off everything and says "Santa, now will you stay with me?"
Santa replies
"Gotta stay, gotta stay,
can't get up the chimney
with my dick this way!"
Santa Claus makes his way down the chimney, and is met by a lovely young woman in a robe.
She says "Santa, how about giving me a special present. I know you'd like to come into my bedroom."
Santa responds "Ho! Ho! Ho! Gotta go. Gotta go. Gotta deliver all these toys to the children you know."
The lovely young thing peels off her robe, revealing a skimpy negligee. Santa looks up from his sack of gifts, and she says "I've got something special for you Santa. Can't you stay for just a little while? I know you want me. Let me make this Christmas eve unforgetable."
Santa responds "Ho! Ho! Ho! Gotta go. Gotta go. Gotta deliver all these toys to the children you know."
Not to be denied, she strips off the negligee, revealing her naughty bits, and they were quite nice naughty bits, I might add. And she says "Santa, this is your last chance. This body is your gift."
Santa responds "Hey! Hey! Hey! Gotta stay. more...