Deliver Jokes / Recent Jokes
One Christmas Eve, Santa Claus comes down the chimney and is startled by a beautiful 19 year old blonde. She asks "Santa, will you stay with me?" Santa says, "Ho Ho Ho I gotta go, gotta go! I gotta deliver these toys to the children, y'know!"She takes off her nightgown, and wearing only a bra and panties, she asks "Santa, now will you stay with me?" Santa says, "Ho Ho Ho I gotta go, gotta go! I gotta deliver these toys to the children, y'know!"She takes off everything and asks "Santa, now will you stay with me?" Santa replies "Hey Hey Hey I gotta stay, gotta stay! I can't get up the chimney with my dick this way!"
Santa was delivering presents. He went down this one chimney and a woman was lying on the couch in her bra and underwear. She told Santa that she had been very good that year. He said Ho, Ho, Ho gotta go gotta go, got to deliver these presents. She takes off her bra and says now can you stay? He says Ho, Ho, Ho gotta go gotta go got to deliver these presents. Then, she takes off her underwear and says now can you stay. Santa says hey hey hey gotta stay gotta stay cant go up the chimney with my dick this way.
One Christmas Eve, Santa Claus comes down the chimney and is startled by a beautiful 19 year old blonde. She said "Santa, will you stay with me?", Santa replied, "Ho Ho Ho gotta go, gotta go, gotta deliver these toys to good girls and boys."
So she took off her night gown, wearing only a bra and panties, she asked "Santa, now will you stay with me?"
"Ho Ho Ho gotta go, gotta go, gotta deliver these toys to gook girls and boys."
She takes off everything and says "Santa, now will you stay with me?"
Santa replies "Gotta stay, gotta stay, can't get up the chimney with my dick this way!"
An old country doctor went way out to the boondocks to deliver a baby. It was so really far out and there was no electricity. When the doctor arrived, no one was home except for the laboring mother and her 5 year old child. The doctor instructed the child to hold a lantern high so he could see while he helped the woman deliver the baby. The child did so, the mother pushed, and after a little while, the doctor lifted the newborn baby by the feet and spanked him on the bottom to get him to take his first breath." Hit him again Doc, Hit him again!" the 5 yr. old said." He shouldn't have crawled up there in the first place!!"
Berlin - Just after WWII.
A young woman made the following report to the police. She had met a blind man at a rally. She claims that they hit it off pretty well and the blind man asked her for a favor, could she possibly deliver the letter to the address on the envelope? As it was on her way home, she agreed.
She started out to deliver the letter, but then turned around to ask the man a question. To her dismay, she spotted him hurrying through the crowd in the opposite direction - without his dark glasses or white cane.
Sensing something seriously dodgy, she went straight to the police, who raided the address on the envelope, where they found heaps of human flesh for sale.
What was in the envelope? A note which said "this is the last one I am sending you today." (The girl, that is...)
After two-week criminal trial in a very high profile bank robbery case, the jury finally ended its hours of deliberations and entered the courtroom to deliver its verdict to the judge.
The judge turns to the jury foreman and asks, "Has the jury reached a verdict in this case?"
"Yes we have, your honor," the foreman responded.
"Would you please pass it to me,"
The judge declared, as he motioned for the bailiff to retrieve the verdict slip from the foreman and deliver it to him.
After the judge reads the verdict himself, he delivers the verdict slip back to his bailiff to be returned to the foreman and instructs the foreman, "Please read your verdict to the court."
"We find the defendant NOT GUILTY of all four counts of bank robbery," stated the foreman.
The family and friends of the defendant jump for joy at the sound of the "not guilty" verdict and hug each other as they shout expressions of divine more...
On Christmas eve, Santa was working hard leaving presents for all the good little girls and boys of the world, when he came to this house that Beth lived at. Beth was a very hot 19 year old, and was waiting up to see Santa. When Santa started to leave the presents under the tree, Beth said hey Santa, and he turned around to see beth in a bathrobe just standing there. She said all I want for Christmas, is for you to make love to me?
Santa looked at Beth and said HO Ho Ho gotta go go go, and deliver presants to all the good little boys and girls of the world. Just then Beth undone her robe and was standing in a very naughty nightie, and said Santa please take me? Santa looked at her and said again, HO Ho Ho gotta go go go, and deliver presants to all the good little boys and girls of the world.
Beth was so horny, and she untied the nightie, and was standing naked and again said Santa get over here and fuck me? Santa turned for the third time and said, hey hey hey, gotta stay more...