Drowned Jokes / Recent Jokes

Dear Son,
I am writing this slow cause I know you can't read fast. We don't live where we did when you left. Your dad read in the paper that most accidents happened within 20 miles of home, so we moved. I won't be able to send you the address cause the last family that lived here took
the numbers with them for their next house so they won't have to change their address. Wish I had thought of that.
This place has a small washing machine. The first day I put four shirts in it, pulled the chain and haven't seen them since.
It only rained twice this week - three days the first time and four days the second.
The coat you wanted me to send you; your aunt Sue said it would be a little too heavy to send in the mail with them heavy buttons, so we cut them off and put them in the pockets. Don't tell anyone.
We got a bill from the funeral home, said we didn't make the last payment on Grandma's funeral bill; up she comes. Lucky we have a spare bedroom in the new place. We more...

Dear Son:
I'm writing this slow cause I know you can't read fast. We don't live where we did when' you left. Your dad read in the paper where the most accidents happen within twenty mile of home, so we moved. I wont be able to send you the address as the last Kentuckian family that lived here took the number with them so the wouldn't have to change their address.
This place has a washing machine. The first day 1 put four shirts in it, pulled the chain, and haven't seen'em since. It only rained twice this week, three days the first time. and four days the second time. The coat you wanted me to send you, your Aunt Sue said It would be a little to heavy to send in the mail with them heavy buttons on, so we cut`em off and put`em in the pockets. We got a bill from the funeral home said if we didn't make the last payment on Grandmas funeral bill, up she comes. Your father, he has a lovely new job. He has over 500 men under him. He's cutting grass at the cemetery. Your sister had a more...

Dear Son,
I'm writing this letter slow because I know you can't read fast. We don't live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in the Newspaper that most accidents happen within 20 miles from your home, So we moved.
I won't be able to send you the address because the last
Arkansas family that lived here took the house numbers when they Moved so that they would not have to change their address.
This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine. I'm not sure It works so well though. Last week I put a load in and pulled the chain And haven't seen them since.
The weather isn't bad here. It only rained twice last week; the first time For three days and the second time for four days.
About the coat you wanted me to send you, your Uncle Stanley said it Would be to heavy to send in the mail with the buttons on, so we cut Them off and put them in the pockets.
John locked his keys in the car yesterday. We were really worried Because it took him two more...

Dear Son,
I'm writing this slow 'cause I know you can't read fast. We don't live where we did when you left. Your dad read in the paper that most accidents happen within twenty miles of home, so we moved. Won't be able to send you the address as the last Arkansas family that lived here took the numbers with them for their house, so they wouldn't have to change their address.
This place has a washing machine. The first day I put four shirts in it, pulled the chain and haven't seen 'em since.
It only rained twice this week, three days the first time and four days the second time.
The coat you wanted me to send to you, Aunt Sue said it would be a little too heavy to send in the mail with them heavy buttons, so we cut them off and put them in the pockets.
We got a bill from the funeral home, and it said if we didn't make the final payment on Grandma's funderal bill, up she comes.
About your sister, she had a baby this morning. I haven't found out whether if it is a more...

Dear Son,
I know you can't read fast, so I'm writing this letter slow.
We don't live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in the newspaper that most accidents happen within 20 miles of your home, so we moved.
I won't be able to send you the address cause the last Arkansas family that lived here took the house numbers when they moved so they wouldn't have to change their address.
It's a really nice place and even has a washing machine. I'm not real sure it works so well though. Last week I put a load of clothes in and pulled the chain. We haven't seen them since.
The weather isn't too bad here. It only rained twice last week; the first time for four days and the second time for three days.
About that coat you wanted me to send you; your Uncle Earl said it would be too heavy to send in the mail with the buttons on, so we cut them off. You'll find them in the pockets.
Billy Bob locked his keys in the car yesterday. We were really worried because it more...

On a farm out in the country lived a man and a woman and their three sons. Early one morning, the woman awoke, and while looking out of the window onto to the pasture, she saw that the family's only cow was lying dead in the field. The situation looked hopeless to her-how could she possibly continue to feed her family now? In a depressed state of mind, she hung herself.

When the man awoke to find his wife dead, as well as the cow, he too began to see the hopelessness of the situation, and he shot himself in the head. Now the oldest son woke up to discover his parents dead (and the cow!), and he decided to go down to the river and drown himself. When he got to the river, he discovered a mermaid sitting on the bank.

She said, "I've seen all and know the reason for your despair. But if you will have sex with me five times in a row, I will restore your parents and the cow to you." The son agreed to try, but after four times, he was simply unable to satisfy more...

Dearest Koos
I'm writing this slow because I know you can't read fast.
We don't live where we did when you left home. Your pa read in the newspaper that almost all accidents happen within 20 km of your home, so we moved. I won't be able to send you the address because the last family that lived here took the house numbers when they moved so they wouldn't have to change their address.
This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine. I'm not sure it works so well, though. Last week I put a load of clothes in and pulled the chain. We haven't seen them since.
The weather isn't bad here. It only rained twice last week; the first time for three days and the second time for four days.
About that coat you wanted me to send; your oom Frikkie said it would be too heavy to send in the mail with the buttons on, so we cut them off and put them in their pockets.
Pietie locked his keys in the car yesterday. We were really worried because it took him two hours to get more...