Elephants Jokes / Recent Jokes

Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant with a kangaroo?
A: Holes all over Australia.
Q: What do you get if you cross an elephant with a whale?
A: A submarine with a built-in snorkel.
Q: Why did the elephant cross the road?
A: Chicken's day off.
Q: Why do elephants have trunks?
A: Because they would look silly with glove compartments.
Q: Why do elephants drink so much?
A: To try to forget.
Q: How can you tell if an elephant is getting ready to charge?
A: He pull out his Diners' Club card.
Q: What do you get when two giraffes collide?
A: A giraffic jam.

Q: What do you know when you see three elephants walking down the street wearing pink sweatshirts? A: They're all on the same team. Q: How do you know if there's an elephant in bed with you? A: She has a big' E' on her pajama jacket pocket. Q: Why won't they allow elephants in public swimming pools? A: Because they might let down their trunks. Q. Why do elephants have four feet? A. Because lady elephants have big twats. Q: What do elephants use for tampons? A: Sheep. Q: What do elephants use for condoms? A: Snakes. Q: What do elephants use for vibrators? A: Epileptic pigmies. Q: Why do elephants have long trunks? A:' Cos sheep don't have strings. Q: How do you know when an elephant has its period? A: There is a quarter on your dresser and your mattress is missing. Q: What is an elephant's sex organ? A: His foot... If he steps on you you're FUCKED! Q: What do you call any elephant who is an expert on skin disorders? A: A pachydermatologist. Q: How do you stop an elephant from charging? more...

Q: How many elephants can you fit in a VW?
A: Four. Two in front, two in back.
Q: How can you tell if you have an elephant in your fridge?
A: All the Jell-o is gone
Q: How can you tell if you have two elephants in your fridge?
A: All the Jell-o is gone, and there's tracks in the butter
Q: How can you tell if you have three elephants in your fridge?
A: All the Jell-o is gone, there's tracks in the butter, and the roast is half eaten.
Q: How can you tell if there are four elephants in your fridge?
A: There's a VW parked out front.

How can you tell elephants love to travel? They are always packing their trunk!

Q: How many elephants does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Two, but it has to be a pretty big light bulb!

Teacher To The Student: Why Are You Tearing Up Your Homework Copy?
Student: To Keep The Elephants Away.
Teacher: But There Are No Elephants Here.
Student: See, How Effective It Is!!!

Getting Things Done Around Here Is Like Mating Elephants!

1. It's Done At A High Level.

2. It's Accomplished With A Great Deal Of Roaring And
Screaming.

3. It Takes Two Years To Produce Results.