Fairy Jokes / Recent Jokes
Cinderella wants to go to the ball, but her wicked stepmother won't let her. As
Cinderella sits crying in the garden, her fairy godmother appears, and promises
to provide Cinderella with everything she needs to go to the ball, but only on
two conditions.
"First, you must wear a diaphragm."
Cinderella agrees. "What's the second condition?"
"You must be home by 2 a.m. Any later, and your diaphragm will turn into a
pumpkin."
Cinderella agrees to be home by 2. The appointed hour comes and goes, and
Cinderella doesn't show up. Finally, at 5 a.m., Cinderella shows up, looking
love-struck and very satisfied.
"Where have you been?" demands the fairy godmother, "Your diaphragm was supposed
to turn into a pumpkin three hours ago!"
"I met a prince, Fairy Godmother. He took care of everything."
"I know of no prince with that kind of power! What was his name?"
"I more...
Cinderella was now 75 years old. After a fulfilling life with the now
dead Prince, she happily sat upon her rocking chair, watching the
world go by from her front porch, with a cat called Alan for
companionship.
One sunny afternoon, out of nowhere, appeared the Fairy Godmother.
Cinderella said, "Fairy Godmother, what are you doing here after all
these years?"
The Fairy Godmother replied, "Well, Cinderella, since you have lived a
good, wholesome life since we last met, I have decided to grant you
three wishes. Is there anything for which your heart still yearns?"
Cinderella is overjoyed, and after some thoughtful consideration, and
almost under her breath, she uttered her first wish, "I wish I was
wealthy beyond comprehension."
Instantly, her rocking chair was turned into solid gold.
Cinderella was stunned. Alan, her old faithful cat, jumped off her lap
and scampered to the edge of the porch, more...
An old woman saved a Fairy’s life. To repay this, the Fairy promised to grant the old woman three wishes.
For the first wish, the old lady asked to become young and beautiful. Poof! She became young and beautiful.
For the second wish, the old lady asked to be richest woman in the world. “Poof! She was the richest woman in the world.
For the last wish, she pointed at the cat she had kept for years. She asked that he be turned into the most handsome man on earth. After all, he had been her best friend for so many years. Poof! The Fairy turned the cat into the most handsome man on earth.
The old lady and the Fairy said their goodbyes.
After the Fairy left, the handsome man (old cat) strolled over to her and asked, “Now aren’t you sorry you had me neutered?!!! ”
A fairy tale starts with "Once upon a time".
A sea story starts with "This is a no-sh*tter".
Cinderella REALLY wanted to go to Prince Charming's ball, but as you know the evil stepsisiers and stepmother will not let her. So they leave her all alone on the big night, cleaning the place." Oh, how I wish I could go!" Cinderella sighed. No sooner had she said this than her Fairy Godmother appeared, holding a long, beautiful white dress." Here, god-child," the fairy said, "try this on." So Cinderella puts the thing on, and it fits perfectly, except she notices some red drops on the white fabric. "Dammit" Cinderella said" of all the lousy nights to get my period!"So the God mother presents her with a magic Tampon to solve the problem, but the tampon has a warning on it: "Please return to the house by midnight or the tampon will be turned into a pumpkin." Cinderella puts it in her and goes to the Ball. Meanwhile, the Fairy Godmother awaits Cinderella's return. 10 o'clock --11 o'clock --12 o'clock--1 o'clockFinally, at more...
Son:"Mom, do all fairy tales begin with 'Once upon a time' and 'long ago'?"
Mom:"No dear, sometimes they begin with 'honey, I was delayed at the office...'"
Q: Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, a dumb blonde, and a smart blonde are walking down the street when they spot a $10 bill. Who picks it up? A: The dumb blonde! because, there is no such thing as Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, or a smart blonde.