Feet Jokes / Recent Jokes

Why do women have smaller feet than men?
So they can stand closer to the kitchen sink.

Three economists are out deer hunting one day when they see a huge buck in the clearing in front of them. The first economist takes aim with his rifle and fires. The bullet goes flying by the deer, about 20 feet in front of it.
The second economist decides to give it a try. He takes aim and shoots. The bullet goes flying by the deer, this time about 20 feet behind the deer.
At this point, the third economist starts jumping up and down, overcome with joy, yelling: WE GOT IT! WE GOT IT!!

Q. What is the mating call of the ugly blonde?
A. (Screaming) "I said. I'm drunk!"
Q. Why do blondes wear green lipstick?
A. Because red means stop.
Q. Why do blondes wear hoop earrings?
A. They have to have some place to rest their ankles.
Q. Why do blondes where big hoop earrings?
A. To put their feet through.
Q. What's a brunette's mating call?
A. Has that blonde gone yet?
A2. When is that blonde bitch going to leave!?
A3. "All the blondes have gone home!"
Q. What do you say to a blonde that won't give in?
A. "Have another beer."
Q. Why is a blonde like a door knob?
A. Because everybody gets a turn.
Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a Porsche?
A. You don't lend the Porsche out to your friend.
Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a toothbrush?
A. You don't let your best friend borrow your toothbrush.
Q. What is the difference between more...

A small boy was asked by his teacher, "What is the size of the Democratic Party?" "About 5 feet 2 inches," he replied promptly. "NO!" exploded the teacher.. "I mean, how MANY members does it have? How did you get 5 feet 2 inches?" "Well," replied the boy, "my father is 6 feet tall and every night he puts his hands to his chin and says.. "I've had it up to HERE with the Democratic Party!"

The following is a list of the Cartoon Laws Of Physics:
Cartoon Law I
Any body suspended in space will remain in space until made aware of its situation.
Daffy Duck steps off a cliff, expecting further pastureland. He loiters in midair, soliloquizing flippantly, until he chances to look down. At this point, the familiar principle of 32 feet per second takes over.
Cartoon Law II
Any body in motion will tend to remain in motion until solid matter intervenes suddenly.
Whether shot from a cannon or in hot pursuit on foot, cartoon characters are so absolute in their momentum that only a telephone pole or an outsize boulder retards their forward motion absolutely. Sir Isaac Newton called this sudden termination of motion the stooge's surcease.
Cartoon Law III
Any body passing through solid matter will leave a perforation conforming to its perimeter.
Also called the silhouette of passage, this phenomenon is the speciality of victims of directed-pressure more...

A man and a woman were talking.The woman asked the man,"three black roosters were sitting on a fence, how many feet were there all together?"
The man replies,"there are six feet."
"Ok", says the woman,"how many beeks are there?"
The man replies,"three."
The woman then says,"A white cat comes along and jumps on the fence, how many whiskers does it have?"
The man answers,"six, no wait eight." The woman asked,"are you sure?"
"No" replies the man
Then the woman asked,"how is it that you know so much about black cock and not enough about white pussy?"

When lawyers die, why are they buried in a hole 24 feet deep?
Because down deep, they are all nice guys.