Finney Jokes / Recent Jokes
Gallagher opened the morning newspaper and was dumbfounded to read in the obituary column that he had died. He quickly phoned his best friend Finney. "Did you see the paper?" asked Gallagher. "They say I died!!" "Yes, I saw it!" replied Finney. "Where are you callin` from?"
Gallagher opened the morning newspaper and was dumbfounded to read in the obituary column that he had died. He quickly phoned his best friend Finney. "Did you see the paper?" asked Gallagher. "They say I died!!" "Yes, I saw it!" replied Finney. "Where are you callin' from?"
Extracted from US news papers:
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In Detroit, the lawyer for accused murderer Rondelle Woods, 23, delivered part of his closing
argument to the jury in rap:' Went to a party, sweet 16, decided to stay on the scene.' Woods was
acquitted. But in Las Vegas in December, Eric Clark, 22, pleaded with the judge, in rap for a light
sentence:' I'm sellin' dope, and I as gettin' paid too blind to see how I was gettin' played.' He
got 23 years. - Universal Press Syndicate
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A Tokyo company, Juonsha, recently began offering a mail-order curse kit, featuring a straw doll to
represent the hexee, along with eight accessories, including nails, a curse manual, and a
curse-blocking doll to ward off return curses. The company at first marketed to boys and girls
bullied at school, but discovered the major market is women who hope to put spells on neighbors,
in-laws and more...
Parties, presents, those Christmas crying jagsso much to do! That's why Modern Humorist wants to simplify your holidays with an advent calendar you don't have to wait to open. No tiny doors to release each day, no little stale chocolates: It's all the advent you want all at once. If you've already missed some days, get reading!
December 1
Shining star of the East (Here, Naos in the constellation Puppis. Naos is a blazing supergiant with no official Christian affiliation and may be admired by all religious peoples, as well as nonreligious peoples.)
December 2
A sweet child singing carols (It may appear the child is mouthing the word "bottom" but surely that is a misperception on your part.)
December 3
A sprig of mistletoe (Poisonous, class B; swelling possible.)
December 4
Albert Finney (Plays Scrooge when Michael Caine demands cut of back end.)
December 5
Scene of falling snowflakes (Flakes #4, 678, 090 and #35, 097, 977? more...