Flea Jokes / Recent Jokes
A prominent Polish scientist conducted very important experiment. He trained a flea to jump upon giving her a verbal command ("Jump!").In a first stage of experiment he removed flea's leg, told her to jump, and the flea jumped. So he wrote in his scientific notebook: "Upon removing one leg all flea organs function properly."So, he removed the second leg, asked the flea to jump, she obeyed, so he wrote again: "Upon removing the second leg all flea organs function properly."Thereafter he removed all the legs but one, the flea jumped when ordered, so he wrote again: "Upon removing the next leg all flea organs function properly."Then he removed the last leg. Told flea to jump, and nothing happened. He did not want to take a chance, so he repeated the experiment several times, and the leg less flea never jumped. So he wrote the conclusion: "Upon removing the last leg the flea loses sense of hearing"
If a flea and a fly pass each other what time is it? Fly past flea.
A flea jumped over the swinging doors of a saloon, drank three whiskeys and jumped out again. He picked himself up from the dirt, dusted himself down and said, "OK, who moved my dog?"
Attend now to a fable that proves that lasting fame is not always built upon success: Once upon a time, two boll weevils from the Deep South traveled to New York, there to seek their fortune. Upon arriving, the first boll weevil got a job as a ringmaster in a small flea circus. As time went by, he moved to bigger and better flea circuses until he became internationally renowned as a flea-circus impresario. The other boll weevil, however, was unable to find any employment and, as time passed, he faded into total obscurity.
That was fifty years ago. But today, do you suppose anyone remembers that boll weevil who was once impresario of the world's greatest flea circuses? No! But we do remember the other one-the one who was a failure-for, even today, we refer to him as "the lesser of two weevils."
What is the most faithful insect? A flea, once they find someone they like they stick to them! What insect runs away from everything? A flee! What is the difference between a flea and a wolf? One prowls on the hairy and the other howls on the prairie! What to you call a Russian flea? A Moscow-ito! Two fleas where running across the top of a cereal packet?"Why are we running so fast?" said one Because it says "Tear along the dotted line" What do you call a flea that lives in an idiots ear? A space invader! What do you get if you cross a rabbit and a flea? Bugs Bunny! How do you start an insect race? One, two, flea - go! How do you find where a flea has bitten you? Start from scratch! What is a flea's favorite book? The itch-hikers guide to the galaxy!
Teacher: What Is The Difference Between A Flea And An Elephant?
Lila: An Elephant Can Have Fleas But A Flea Cannot Have An Elephant.