Flood Jokes / Recent Jokes

A lawyer and an engineer were fishing in the Caribbean.
The lawyer said, "I am here because my house burned down and everything I owned
was destroyed by the fire. But my insurance company paid for everything."
"That is quite a coincidence", said the engineer, "I am here because my house
and all my belongings were destroyed by a flood, and my insurance company also
paid for everything."
The lawyer looked somewhat confused. "How did you start the flood?", he asked.

A lawyer and an engineer were fishing in the Caribbean. The lawyer said ''I'm here 'cause my house burned down and everything I owned was destroyed by the fire. The insurance company paid for everything.''
''That's quite a coincidence,'' said the engineer, ''I'm here 'cause my house and all my belongings were destroyed by a flood, and my insurance company also paid for everything.''
The lawyer pondered the engineer's plight for a moment and, looking somewhat confused, asked, ''How do you start a flood?''

A lawyer and an engineer were fishing in the Caribbean. The lawyer said, "I'm here because my house burned down, and all I owned was destroyed by the fire. The insurance company paid for everything and I'm using some of the insurance money for this trip."
"That's quite a coincidence," said the engineer. "I'm here because my house and all my belongings were destroyed by a flood, and my insurance company also paid for everything."
The lawyer looked somewhat confused. "How do you start a flood?" he asked.

It had been raining for days and days, and a great flood had come over the land. The waters rose so high that one man was forced to climb onto the roof of his house.
As the waters rose higher and higher, a man in a rowboat appeared, and told him to get in. "No," replied the man on the roof. "I have faith in the Lord; the Lord will save me." So the man in the rowboat went away. The man on the roof prayed for God to save him.
The waters rose higher and higher, and suddenly a speedboat appeared. "Climb in!" shouted a man in the boat. "No," replied the man on the roof. "I have faith in the Lord; the Lord will save me." So the man in the speedboat went away. The man on the roof prayed for God to save him.
The waters continued to rise. A helicopter appeared and over the loudspeaker, the pilot announced he would lower a rope to the man on the roof. "No," replied the man on the roof. "I have faith in the Lord; the more...

A lawyer and an engineer were fishing in the Caribbean. The lawyer said "I'm here because my house burned down and everything I owned was destroyed by the fire. The insurance company paid for everything."
"That's quite a coincidence", said the engineer, "I'm here because my house and all my belongings were destroyed by a flood, and my insurance company also paid for everything."
The lawyer looked somewhat confused. "How do you start a flood?", he asked.

A businessman and a lawyer were fishing in the Caribbean. Attempting to strike up a conversation, the lawyer said, "I'm here because my house burned down and everything I owned was destroyed in the fire. My insurance paid for everything."
"What a coincidence," said the businessman. "I'm here because my house and all of my belongings were destroyed by a flood. Fortunately, my insurance company paid for everything too."
Looking a little confused, the lawyer asked, "How do you start a flood?"

Dear Mom and Dad,
Our scoutmaster told us to write to our parents in case you saw the flood on TV and were worried. We are OK. Only one of our tents and two sleeping bags got washed away.
Luckily, none of us got drowned because we were all up the Mountain looking for Chad when it happened. Oh yes, please call Chad's mother and tell her he is OK. He can't write because of the cast. I got to ride in one of the search and rescue jeeps. It was neat. We never would have found him in the dark if it wasn't for the lightning.
Scoutmaster Walt got mad at Chad for going on a hike alone without telling anyone. Chad said he did tell him, but it was during the fire so he probably didn't hear him. Did you know that if you put gas on a fire, the gas can will blow up?
The wet wood didn't burn, but one of the tents did. Also some of our clothes. John is going to look weird until his hair grows back.
We will be home on Saturday if Scoutmaster Walt gets the car fixed. It wasn't his more...