Frenchman Jokes / Recent Jokes
Q. What's the difference between a Frenchman and toast?A. You can't make French soldiers out of toast.
A Frenchman, an Englishman, an American man, and a lawyer were sitting on a train. The Frenchman offered everyone some of his baguette, then threw it out the window, saying, "Don't worry - we have plenty of those where I come from." The Englishman offered everyone a crumpet, then threw the rest out of the window, saying, "Don't worry - we have plenty of those where I come from." Then the American threw the lawyer out the window, saying...
Q: What do you call a Frenchman advancing on Baghdad?A: A salesman.
There was a British, a polish, and a Frenchman. They were in a plane that had crashed. They were all really hot as they walked across the desert. After a hour, they saw a magic lamp. They shook it up and saw a genie come out. The genie told them that they each got one wish.
They British wished for a fan to cool down. The Polish wished for a jug of water so he could drink it. The Frenchman wished for a car door, so when he got hot, he could pull down the window.
AN Englishman, a Frenchman and a Russian were arguing about the nationality of Adam and Eve.
'They must have been English,' declared the Englishman.' Only a gentleman would share his last apple with a woman.'
'They were undoubtedly French,' said the Frenchman.' Who else could seduce a woman so easily?'
I think they were Russians,' said the Russian.' After all, who else could walk stark naked, feed on one apple between the two of them and think they were in Paradise?'
A Frenchman and an Italian were seated next to an American on anoverseas flight. After a few cocktails, the men began discussingtheir home lives." Last night I made love to my wife four times," the Frenchmanbragged, "and this morning she made me delicious crepes andshe told me how much she adored me." "Ah, last night I made love to my wife six times," the Italianresponded, "and this morning she made me a wonderful omelet andtold me she could never love another man." When the American remained silent, the Frenchman smugly asked,"And how many times did you make love to your wife last night?" "Once," he replied." Only once?" the Italian arrogantly snorted. "And what did she sayto you this morning?" "Don't stop."
On a transatlantic trip a freighter comes across three survivors of a shipwreck bobbing about sunburned and thirsty, in a rubber raft. The freighter`s captain, a Britisher, leans over the side and shouts, "I`d like to rescue you fellows, but I`ve got a few questions first." The first man, a Frenchman, he asks, "What`s the worst disaster in naval history?" "That would be the sinking of the Titanic," replies the Frenchman, and the captain throws down a rope and pulls him up. The next question he posed to the Irishman. "Can you tell me how many died?" "I`d say about 1250 people," came the reply, and a rope was dropped over the side to pull him aboard. "You`re from Poland aren`t you?" said the captain to the lone man in the raft. Turning away from the railing, the captain says, "Name `em."