Funny Ads Jokes / Recent Jokes
Whatever Their motives, Moms Who Kill Kids still Shock Us: Holland Sentinal, date unknown.Survey Finds Dirtier Subways After Cleaning Jobs Were Cut: The New York Times, November 22Larger Kangaroos Leap Farther, Researchers Find: The Los Angeles Times, November 2'Light' meals are lower in fat, calories: Huntington Herald-Dispatch, November 30Alcohol ads promote drinking: The Hartford Courant, November 18Malls try to attract shoppers: The Baltimore Sun, October 22Official: Only rain will cure drought: The Herald-News, Westpost, MassachusettsTeen-age girls often have babies fathered by men: The Sunday Oregonian, September 24
Low Wages Said Key to Poverty: Newsday, July 11Man shoots neighbor with machete: The Miami Herald, July 3Tomatoes come in big, little, medium sizes: The Daily Progress, Charlottesville, Virginia, March 30Dirty-Air Cities Far Deadlier Than Clean Ones, Study Shows: The New York Times, March 10Man Run Over by Freight Train Dies: The Los Angeles Times, March 2Scientists see quakes in L.A. future: The Oregonian, January 28Wachtler tells graduates that life in jail is demeaning: The Buffalo News, February 26Free Advice: Bundle up when out in the cold: Lexington Herald-Leader, January 26
Prosecution paints O.J. as a wife-killer: Fort Lauderdale Sun-Sentinel, January 25Economist uses theory to explain economy: Collinsville Herald-Journal, February 8Bible church's focus is the Bible: Saint Augustine Record, Florida, December 3, 1994Clinton pledges restraint in use of nuclear weapons: Cedar Rapids Gazette, April 6Discoveries: Older blacks have edge in longevity: The Chicago Tribune, March 5Court Rules Boxer Shorts Are Indeed Underwear: Journal of Commerce, April 20Biting nails can be sign of tenseness in a person: The Daily Gazette of Schenectady, New York, May 2Lack of brains hinders research: The Columbus Dispatch, April 16
Snow blower for sale...only used on snowy days. 2 Wire mesh butchering gloves, 1 5-finger, 1 3-finger, pair: $15 Tickle Me Elmo, still in box, comes with it's own 1988 Mustang, 5l, auto, excellent condition $6800 Tickle Me Elmo. New in box. Hardly tickled. $700 Valentines Day Sale: Ty-D-Bol Blue Toss-Ins Star Wars Job of the Hut -- $15 Do something special for your Valentine - Have your septic tank pumped. Full sized mattress. 20 Yr warranty. Like new. Slight urine smell.
Free 1 can of pork & beans with purchase of 3 br 2 bth home. For sale: Lee Majors (6 million dollar man) - $50 Nordic track $300 - hardly used - call chubbie at: Bill's Septic Cleaning - "We haul American made products" Shakespeare's Pizza - Free Chopsticks Hummels - Largest selection ever - "if it's in stock, we have it!" President's Choice - Cow manure - 2 33lb bags - $5 Harrisburg Postal Employees Gun Club
Georgia peaches - California grown - 89 cents lb. Nice parachute - never opened - used once - slightly stainedWhirlpool built in oven -- frost free! Frozen Soft & Gentle bath tissue - 4 rolls 99 cents American flag - 60 stars - pole included - $100 Tired of working for only $9.75 per hour? We offer profit sharing and flexible hours. Starting pay: $7 - $9 per hour. Notice: to person or persons who took the large pumpkin on highway 87 near Southridge Storage. Please return the pumpkin and be checked. Pumpkin may be radioactive. All other plants in vincinity are dead.
The most romantic love songs of the' 50s: including "16 Tons" by Tennessee Ernie Ford Exercise equipment queen size mattress & box spring - $175. Our sofa seats the whole mob - and it's made of 100% Italian leather. Joining nudist colony, must sell washer & dryer - $300. Found: Dirty white dog...looks like a rat...been out awhile... Better be a reward. Ground Beast: 99 cents lb. Open house - Body Shapers Toning Salon - free coffee & donuts