Genealogist Jokes

Q, What is the difference between a genealogist and a gynecologist?
A. A genealogist looks up your family tree... A gynecologist looks up your family bush!

'Twas the night before Christmas when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even my spouse.
The dining room table with clutter was spread
With pedigree charts and with letters which said...
"Too bad about the data for which you wrote
Sank in a storm on an ill fated boat."
Stacks of old copies of wills and the such
Were proof that my work had become much too much.
Our children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of sugarplums danced in their heads.
And I at my table was ready to drop
From work on my album with photos to crop.
Christmas was here, and of such was my lot
That presents and goodies and toys I forgot.
Had I not been so busy with grandparent's wills,
I'd not have forgotten to shop for such thrills.
While others had bought gifts that would bring Christmas cheer;
I'd spent time researching those birth dates and years.
While I was thus musing about my sad more...

Three women argued claiming that one of them has the biggest hole in the universe.
To get a second opinion, they have a genealogist to examine them.
The first woman was examined and the genealogist saw in her hole that a huge truck making a U – turn.
The second woman was examined and the genealogist saw in her hole that a super carrier making a U – turn.
The third woman was examined and the genealogist saw and fainted.
The genealogist saw that all the above was happening in her hole!!

Three women argued claiming that one of them has the biggest hole in the universe.
To get a second opinion, they have a genealogist to examine them.
The first woman was examined and the genealogist saw in her hole that a huge truck making a U – turn.
The second woman was examined and the genealogist saw in her hole that a super carrier making a U – turn.
The third woman was examined and the genealogist saw and fainted.
The genealogist saw that all the above was happening in her hole!!

'Twas the night before Christmas when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even my spouse.
The dining room table with clutter was spread
With pedigree charts and with letters which said. ..
"Too bad about the data for which you wrote
Sank in a storm on an ill fated boat."
Stacks of old copies of wills and the such
Were proof that my work had become much too much.
Our children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of sugarplums danced in their heads.
And I at my table was ready to drop
From work on my album with photos to crop.
Christmas was here, and of such was my lot
That presents and goodies and toys I forgot.
Had I not been so busy with grandparent's wills,
I'd not have forgotten to shop for such thrills.
While others had bought gifts that would bring Christmas cheer;
I'd spent time researching those birth dates and years.
While I was thus musing about more...