Goat Jokes / Recent Jokes

A farmer went lookin 4 his goat in the jungle. In the same jungle there was this couple doing it.
The guys yells out, "What a nice bush!", and the farmer hollers back, "Would you mind checking if my goat is in that bush?"

10. Secretly replace the baby's formula with Folger's Crystals.
9. Get a couple of old refrigerator boxes and paint them up to look like a toll booth. Set it up on your favorite street corner and watch the quarters roll in.
8. Make yourself up like you've been in a horrible, mutilating accident, then go to the emergency room of the nearest hospital. When approached by a nurse or doctor, say, "No, thank-you, I'm
just browsing."
7. Call the Microsoft Support Line and insist on speaking directly to Bill Gates. Tell them that MS-DOS was your idea and you demand royalties. Demand Bill's home phone number. Get verbally abusive when they refuse you.
6. Two words: Cherry Bomb.
5. Make two dinner reservations at the finest restaurant you can find, then dress yourself and a goat in tuxedos. When the Management refuses you service, insist that the animal is a
seeing-eye goat. For added effect, feed the goat a few boxes of EX-LAX before you arrive.
4. more...

A pair of tourists were out in the fields when they discovered an abandoned well near an old farm house. Of course they're curious so they drop a small stone into the well, but they never hear it hit bottom. They search and find a larger rock and drop it into the well but once again hear nothing. They decide they need something larger and search the farm yard for a larger object. After much struggle, they manage to drag a large railroad tie to the edge of the well and drop it over the edge. After several seconds, a goat tears across the yard and without any hesitation, dives head first into the open hole. The two tourists stand in amazement. About then a farmer appears and tells them he is looking for a lost goat. The tourists tell the farmer about the goat diving into the well. "That couldn't be my goat", the farmer replies, "My goat was grazing in the field roped to a railroa d tie!"

A pair of tourists were out in the fields when they discovered an abandoned well near an old farm house. Of course they are curious so they drop a small stone into the well, but they never hear it hit bottom.

They search and find a larger rock and drop it into the well but once again hear nothing. They decide they need something larger and search the farm yard for a larger object.

After much struggle, they manage to drag a large railroad tie to the edge of the well and drop it over the edge. After several seconds, a goat tears across the yard and without any hesitation, dives head first into the open hole.

The two tourists stand in amazement. About then a farmer appears and tells them he is looking for a lost goat.

The tourists tell the farmer about the goat diving into the well.

"That couldnt be my goat", the farmer replies, "My goat was grazing in the field roped to a railroad tie!"

Well, a man was driving down a country road, and he decided to get out and get some fresh air.
He got out, and started walking in a meadow. As he walked, he came upon a hole. Wanting to see how deep it was, he threw a pebble down. No sound. So he threw a medium-sized rock down. No sound.
The man started to get frustrated, so he threw a boulder down. No sound. As he searched about, he spotted a railroad beam. He hauled it over to the hole, and shoved it in. No sound.
He sat down on the ground, exhausted. Suddenly, he saw a goat running at him, full speed. He leaped up, and it brushed past him, and fell in the hole. He listened, but there was no sound.
He sat down again. A few minutes later, a farmer came walking up. The man asked him, “How deep is this hole? ” The farmer said, “Oh. Thats the bottomless pit. It never ends. Say, have you seen my prize goat? ”
The man, not wanting to get the blame, said, “No. ” The farmer said, “Oh well. He can’t more...

Sometimes, it seems like some people are just plain *doomed*. If you don't believe it, consider these weird incidents: *In 1976 a twenty-two-year-old Irishman, Bob Finnegan, was crossing the busy Falls Road in Belfast, when he was struck by a taxi and flung over its roof. The taxi drove away and, as Finnegan lay stunned in the road, another car ran into him, rolling him into the gutter. It too drove on. As a knot of gawkers gathered to examine the magnetic Irishman, a delivery van plowed through the crowd, leaving in its wake three injured bystanders and an even more battered Bob Finnegan. When a fourth vehicle came along, the crowd wisely scattered and only one person was hit - Bob Finnegan. In the space of two minutes Finnegan suffered a fractured skull, broken pelvis, broken leg, and other assorted injuries. Hospital officials said he would recover. *While motorcycling through the Hungarian countryside, Cristo Falatti came up to a railway line just as the crossing gates were coming more...

In the depths of the countryside there lived a farmer who took care of baby animals. The farm was very peaceful until one day the farmer's pig was murdered.
Now the farmer took this incident very seriously, so he started an investigation. Unfortunately, the only witness the farmer had to this murder was his pet bunny rabbit.
Since the rabbit was unable to speak and tell him who murdered the little pig, the farmer lined up his four prime suspects, a cow, a horse, a goat, and a duck, and told the rabbit to pick out who had committed the dirty deed.
The rabbit hopped up and down the line, checking each animal, and then finally hopped forward three feet, and stopped in front of the goat.
"It wasn't me! It wasn't me!" yelled the goat.
The farmer shook his head and said, "The hare's looking at you, kid."