Gujju Jokes

Q: - Why did the Gujju think the film Gandhi was about a woman?
A: - Because Be(h)n Kingsley was in it.
Q: - Why won't the gujju jeweller sell anything to the UP ka bhayiya?
A: - The bhayiya kept giving gujju a bunch of hair each time the gujju asked for' Kesh'
Q: - What did the Gujju mean when he said, "Ramesh no dikro States ma gayon"?
A: - Ramesh's son failed in statistics...
Q) Why did Bill Clinton have the gujju beaten?
A) The gujju told Clinton "You are an IMPOTENT man"
Q) What will a Gujju tell a tomato, coming last in a tomato race?
A) Tomato KETCHUP.
Q) Why did the gujju go to Rome?
A) He wanted to listen to POPE music.
Q) Why did the gujju go to London?
A) To see BIG BEHN.
Q) Why was the gujju stacking up 1 cent coins on the day before exams?
A) He wanted to get "cent-per-cent".
Q) What did the Gujju have in the morning?
A) LIGHT SNAKES for breakfast.
Q) more...

Q) Did you know that Gujarati students are going to start a fraternity?
A) They named it Rho Beta Rho.
Q) Why did the gujjus take 50 paise when they went to watch "GANDHI"?
A) They read Atten( 8 annas)-bourough in the credits.
What is a Gujju picnic koled? - A snake in the grass
Why did the Gujju wear a Tuxedo to his vasectomy?
If he was going to become impotent, he wanted to look impotent.
Why did the American get scared of the Gujju? - Because he said' Sue kare chhe.'
Maro dikro Dubai gayo? - My son drowned.

An (Bahraini) Arab was admitted in the Lilavati Hospital at Mumbai for a heart transplant, but prior to the surgery the doctors needed to store his blood in case need arises.
As the gentleman had a rare type of blood, it couldn’t be found locally. So the call went out to a number of countries. Finally a Gujarati was located who had a similar type of blood.
The Gujarati willingly donated his blood for the Arab. After the surgery, the Arab sent the Gujarati as appreciation for giving his blood, a new Hummer, diamonds, lapiz lazuri jewellery, and a million US dollars.
Once again the Arab had to go through a corrective surgery. His doctor telephoned the Gujarati who was more than happy to donate his blood again.
After the second surgery, the Arab sent the Gujarati a thank you card and a jar of Almond halwa sweets. The Gujarati was shocked to see that the Arab this time did not reciprocate the Gujarati’s kind gesture as he had anticipated.
He phoned the Arab more...

Why did the Gujjus think the man who acted as Gandhi in the film was a woman?

Because his name was ‘Ben’ Kingsley.

Why does the Gujju go to London?

To see his Big Ben.

Why did the visitor to the Gujju home run away when he was offered tea?

Because the Gujju said he would serve snakes with it. (snacks)

What is a Gujju picnic called?

A snake in the grass.

Why did the Gujju wear a Tuxedo to his vasectomy?

If he was going to be impotent, he wanted to look impotent.

Why did the American get scared of the Gujju?

Because he said ‘Sue kare chhe. ’

Why did Bill Clinton have the Gujju beaten?

The Gujju told him, You are an impotent man.

What will a Gujju tell a tomato who is trailing in a vegetable race?

Come on, Tomato, Ketch up.

What did the Gujju mean when he said, Maro dikro STATES ma gayon?

His son more...

For all Gujju children, understand your Parents When they say: They mean:
Pasadi........................... Prashad
Sufuria......................... Saucepan
Sano.............................. Snow
Tikert........................... Ticket
Egg-joss........................ Exhaust
Fota............................... Photos
Lipti.............................. Lipstick
Phast............................. Fast
Pholowur..................... Flower
Gilas.............................. Glass
Palty.............................. Party
Gorment....................... Goverment
Peeja.............................. Pizza
Peejot............................ Peugeot
Fhanta........................... Fanta
Punch............................ Sponge
Booth............................. Car Boot
Kittli.............................. Kettle
Boota.............................. more...