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Signs you've had too much of the 90's!
You try to enter your password on the microwave. You now think of three espressos as "getting wasted. You haven't played solitaire with a real deck of cards in years.
You e-mail your son in his room to tell him that dinner is ready, and he emails you back "What's for dinner?"
You chat several times a day with a stranger from South Africa, but you haven't spoken to your next door neighbor yet this year.
You didn't give your valentine a card this year, but you posted one for your online buddies via a Web page.
The concept of using real money, instead of credit or debit, to make a purchase is totally foreign to you.
You consider 2nd day air delivery painfully slow. Your idea of being organized is multiple colored post-it notes.
And finally... You hear most of your jokes via email instead of in person!

Signs you've had too much of the 90's! You try to enter your password on the microwave. You now think of three espressos as "getting wasted. You haven't played solitaire with a real deck of cards in years.You e-mail your son in his room to tell him that dinner is ready, and he emails you back "What's for dinner?"You chat several times a day with a stranger from South Africa, but you haven't spoken to your next door neighbor yet this year.You didn't give your valentine a card this year, but you posted one for your online buddies via a Web page.The concept of using real money, instead of credit or debit, to make a purchase is totally foreign to you.You consider 2nd day air delivery painfully slow. Your idea of being organized is multiple colored post-it notes.And finally... You hear most of your jokes via email instead of in person!

Top Ten Signs That You've Had Too Much Of The 90's... When you make phone calls from home, you accidentally insert a "9" to get an outside line. When you go home after a long day at work you still answer the phone in a business manner. You hear most of your jokes via email instead of in person. Your idea of being organized is multiple colored post-it notes. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends is that they do not have e-mail addresses. You chat on-line regularly with a stranger from the US, but haven't spoken with your next door neighbor yet this year. You e-mail your work colleague at the desk next to you to ask if they're ready to go to lunch. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 4. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years. You try to enter your password on the microwave.

My friend sent these to me. Thought I would post them so that you can all enjoy. This is proof that women are clever.
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Women's Clever Answers To Pick-Up Lines
Man: "Haven't we met before?"
Woman: "Yes, I'm the receptionist at the V. D. Clinic."
Man: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?"
Woman: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."
Man: "Is this seat empty?"
Woman: "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."
Man: "So, wanna go back to my place?"
Woman: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"
Man: "Your place or mine?"
Woman: "Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine."
Man: "I'd really like to get into your pants."
Woman: "No thanks. There's already one asshole in there."
Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"
Woman: "It's in more...

Dear Bobby Ray,
I'm writing this letter slow, because I know you can't read fast.
We don't live where we did when you left home. Your Dad read in the newspaper that most accidents happen within 20 miles from your home, so we moved.
I won't be able to send you the address because the last family that lived here took the house numbers when they moved so that they wouldn't have to change their address.
This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine. I'm not sure it works so well though, last week I put a load in and pulled the chain and haven't seen them since.
The weather isn't bad here. It only rained twice last week, the first time for four days, and the second time for six days.
About that coat you wanted me to send you, your Uncle Stanley said it would be too heavy to send in the mail with the buttons on, so we cut them off and put them in the pockets.
Tom locked his keys in the car yesterday. We were really worried because it took him two hours more...

1. You just tried to enter your password on the microwave.2. You now think of three espressos as "getting wasted."3. You haven't played solitaire with a real deck of cards in years.4. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three.5. You call your son's beeper to let him know it's time to eat. He e-mails you back from his bedroom, "What's for dinner?"6. Your daughter sells Girl Scout Cookies via her web site.7. You chat several times a day with a stranger from South Africa, but you haven't spoken with your next door neighbor yet this year.8. You didn't give your valentine a card this year, but you posted one for your e-mail buddies via a web page.9. Your daughter just bought a CD of all the records your College roommate used to play.10. You check the ingredients on a can of chicken noodle soup to see if it contains Echinacea.11. Your grandmother clogs up your e-mail inbox asking you to send her a JPEG file of your newborn so she can create a more...

Dear God,
So far today,
I've done all right.
I haven't gossiped. I haven't lost my temper. I haven't been greedy,
grumpy, nasty, selfish, or overindulgent.
I am very thankful for that.
But, in a few minutes, God, I'm going to get out of bed; and from then on,
I'm probably going to need a lot more help.
Amen